ON THE FRINGE—AL TZITZIT

Parshat Bo, 5772 (Jan. 2012)

2012-01-26T17:41:00.013-05:00

[I'm going to try to remember to date my parsha posts by year--I should have done that from the beginning, but better late than never.]

You can read the basics here.

And the answer to the question, "Does "Yeter," an alternative, and probably scribal-error-based, name for Yitro, mean anything?" is "Yes, it means "the rest, over- , excess." Now why didn't I think to look it up in my trusty Hebrew/English dictionary/milon until I read it again in this week's parsha, in Sh'mot/Exodus, chapter 10, verse 5? That word just jumped off the page when I heard it during the Torah reading at minyan this morning.

My husband has a book about major and minor Jewish holidays called The Jewish Festivals (UAHC, 1938). The author thereof, Hayyim Schauss, posits that Passover/Pesach was originally two separate holidays, one for the shepherds (hence the lamb sacrifice) and one for the farmers (hence the matzah). That's fairly visible in the text of this parsha, where the sacrifice and the matzah are described separately, as if they were not entirely unrelated. It was the genius of the ancient sage Hillel to combine the two practices into one "Hillel sandwich," with the lamb sacrifice eaten on matzah.

Here's DovBear's latest Bo post: No one could move during [plague of ] darkness?

Here are some oldies of mine:

Quick thought on Parshat Bo:"Coming out" as Jews (Monday, February 02, 2009) Highlight: G-d commanded us to put blood on our doorposts just to see who'd be willing to announce publicly their identity as Hebrews.

G-d lied (Monday, January 18, 2010) Highlight: Aharon (Aaron) never once spoke alone to Par'oh (Pharaoh) on behalf of Moshe (Moses) despite G-d's assurance to speech-impaired Moshe that Aharon would do the talking.

Parshat Bo notes (Tuesday, January 04, 2011)
Highlight: "Check out Parshat Bo, Exodus Chap. 10, v. 8-13: Moshe tells Par'o [Pharaoh] that they're taking the whole gang to make a sacrifice, but when Par'o objects, saying that only the men should go, HaShem sends another plague! So we women are indispensible for worship!"

A Parshat Bo link, slightly belated (Thursday, January 13, 2011)--A link to Rabbi Barry Leff's post, plus an old post of mine

Parshat Vaeira catch-up

2012-01-24T10:37:00.029-05:00

You can read the basics of last Shabbat's parshat here.

Here's a little something that I spotted this year: What's the story with Sh'mot/Exodus chapter 6, verse 15's statement that Shim'on's/Shimon's/Simeon's/Simon's son Shaul/Saul is the son of a Canaanite woman? Who the heck did the rest of B'nei Yaakov (the sons of Jacob) marry?

On a broader theme, it's all a matter of pollution--once the Nile turns red/becomes polluted, all but the last plague (the death of the firstborn) pretty much follow as a result. It's natural for the frogs to bail out if the water's polluted, then die of whatever got under their skin (literally). The insects follow the mass death of the frogs, and disease results from the insect infestation. Naturally, I can't find the video, but the History Channel telecast a theory that the death of the firstborn was caused when a natural body of water released trapped gas, which killed only those privileged few who slept on close-to-the-ground beds (firstborn sons and high officials) rather than those sleeping higher up on rooftops (the majority of the population), who were at a high-enough elevation that the poisonous gas passed under them. Traditionalists shouldn't be alarmed by this interpretation--all of these natural phenomena could have been caused by G-d.

The haftarah (Ezekiel chapter 28, verse 25-29, verse 21) is not one of the more pleasant readings--("And I will put hooks in your jaws . . . "), and also has the most difficult Hebrew of all the haftarot that I chant.

See also:

Last year's Vaera catch-up (Hmm, I'm making a regular habit of posting late.)

My Limmud NY 2012 Conference link round-up

2012-01-19T16:34:00.011-05:00

Limmud NY 2012 Conference: Some highlights
Limmud reminders for next year
Limmud lesson: Tefillah B'Tzibbur is a gamble :( I never know when there'll be a speed-demon at the amud/prayer-leader's stand.
Missing at Limmud: Zimun and z'mirot

Also missing are photos and/or videos. Let me see what my husband and I managed to shoot--I haven't had time to upload anything yet.

Missing at Limmud: Zimun and z'mirot

2012-01-19T09:58:00.012-05:00

There were so many courses being given during meals at the Limmud NY 2012 Conference that many, if not most, people, just ate quickly or grabbed a take-out box and ate in class. Unfortunately, this embarrassment of riches actually pitted study against song on Shabbat/Sabbath. I was a bit taken aback by the fact that no one stayed at a Shabbat lunch table long enough even to make a m'zuman for singing Birkat HaMazon/ Grace after Meals (as opposed to reciting it silently as an individual), much less long enough to sing a zemer (Shabbat table song) or two. It's a sad state of affairs to be spending a Shabbat with hundreds of Jews and not be able to sing Birkat HaMazon aloud after lunch.

In my opinion, this is one area in which the week-long National Havurah Institute has a clear advantage over the four-day Limmud NY Conference. Since the Institute lasts for an entire week, giving it five full days for classes, there's plenty of time on Shabbat to actually experience some oneg/delight. (We didn't go last summer, but, if memory serves me correctly, there are no classes on Shabbat itself.) I have fond memories of a large group of people sitting around an Institute table singing z'mirot for ages. I wish I could think of a way to encourage more singing on Shabbat at Limmud.

Limmud lesson: Tefillah b'tzibbur is a gamble :(

2012-01-18T22:52:00.016-05:00

I was so looking forward to enjoying a nice, leisurely Shacharit (Morning Service) with lots of congregational singing on Shabbat (Sabbath)--and was very upset when we ended up with a speed-davvenning baal tefillah (prayer leader) who led P'sukei D'Zimrah and Shacharit at roughly the same breakneck pace that I've become accustomed to on a weekday morning. Leaving aside the fact that I obviously couldn't keep up, what kind of Kavod (respect, honor) does it show to Shabbat to pray at the same speed on Shabbos that one uses when trying to get to the commuter train on time?

There are some drawbacks to Limmud's reliance on volunteers to lead services. Those responsible for arranging services may have no idea how well prepared a baal/baalat tefillah is or what his/her "davvenning (praying) style" is. I'll grant you that there's such a thing as too slow, but it's a shame that, even on Shabbat, I can't count on a tefillah b'tzibbur (prayer service with a community) to meet me halfway. What am I supposed to do, go back to davvenning up to Hotzaat HaTorah (the Torah service) bi-y'chidut (by myself)?

Limmud reminders for next year

2012-01-18T17:55:00.040-05:00

Here's the fun part. And now, to business.

My husband's idea to take our bag of light-switch covers, a timer, and a nightlight was brilliant. The timer's plug didn't fit the outlet, so we used the nightlight, which may have saved me from breaking another wrist or two--it was pitch-black in our room after sundown, and that ottoman in front of the armchair at the foot of the bed was almost impossible to see! (For future reference, remember to turn the night-light's shade to face the bed, in order to cut the glare and make it easier to sleep.) And we used the light-switch covers to help us remember to leave the foyer light off, the bathroom light on, and that noisy bathroom ventilation fan off.
Don't forget your neck-roll pillow, next time--a rolled-up tee shirt doesn't work quite as well.
It was a good idea to leave the apartment with both your camera and your Chai necklace already around your neck, so that you wouldn't have to figure out where to pack them and would have easy access to the camera. It was also a good thing that you remembered to recharge both camera batteries.
It was not a good thing that you completely forgot that you should never travel with a pocketless skirt, because a gal always needs pockets in which to put things that should be easily accessible, such as a room key, tissues, and, after Shabbat/Sabbath, a cell phone. Next year, take your navy skirt that does have pockets and doesn't have belt loops (because you're going to enjoy someone else's cooking too much), and the gray knit jacket with lapels, which also has pockets, matches that skirt reasonably well, and is heavier than your gray jacket without pockets. (Don't take the pocketed gray skirt--it's at least an inch shorter, and the hotel is freezing!)
Remember to look for balloons or other markers indicating tables for those wanting to sing z'mirot at dinner on Erev Shabbat.
Get up early enough on Saturday to davven/pray from the Birkot HaTorah/Torah blessings through the "Rabbi Yishmael omer" quote. Include the full three paragraphs of the Sh'ma, so that you can grab a small bread-free breakfast before Shacharit/Morning Service. This early davvening will kill two birds with one stone, since not only is breakfast scheduled before Shabbat/Sabbath morning services, but also, the traditional egalitarian minyan seems always to start the public service right after Rabbi Yishmael omer, at Mizmor, Shir Chanukat HaBayit, L'David (Psalm 30). Note that a good place to davven bi-y'chidut (by oneself) is in the relatively untraveled corridor leading to the Bentley room, which is in an obscure spot off the beaten track and invisible from both the lobby and the elevator bank. An employee told me that the windows there face east.
There's pepper in the egg salad, so you'd best avoid it.
Remember never to put anything irreplacable in your Limmud bag--one poor soul accidentally exchanged her own Limmud bag for someone else's, and lost her cell phone in the process!
Get to the daily Shacharit early, so that you'll have time to put on your tallit, lay tefillin, and davven through Rabbi Yishmael omer before the service begins.

I may add more reminders, if I can think of any. Feel free to add your own suggestions in the comments.

Limmud NY 2012 Conference: Some highlights

2012-01-17T13:29:00.057-05:00

Surprise, surprise: Friday night's dinner was chicken. I found that quite unexpected, given the number of vegetarians in attendance. For the record, even I, a meat-eater, could see that the vegetarian stuffed-pepper entree was unacceptable because it contained no protein source. Nu, adding a few beans to the "stuffing" would have killed you? I sincerely hope that all of the vegetarian entrees will be both tasty and nutritious next year.

Kudos to the Limmud volunteers for arranging for vegetarian and vegan options, "simple food" without spice or sauce for those who needed it, a gluten-free and "allergy" table (providing such goodies as gluten-free corn thins [yum!] and peanut-free almond butter [double yum!] in the dining room), and gluten-free goodies outside the dining room at the coffee bar.

Okay, on to the study sessions.

Friday

I was, apparently, too tired after packing, schlepping to Manhattan, spending two and a half hours on a bus, checking in, and rushing to prep for Shabbat/Sabbath to remember much of what I did after Shabbat dinner. My apologies to Shai Held, for not being able to "retrieve" much of what he said at his interesting session on the Midwives. But I do remember him making the point that the story of the Midwives (Sh'mot/Exodus chapter 1, verses 15-21) is (one of) the earliest recorded instance(s?) of civil disobedience, making it an appropriate discussion topic for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Weekend.

Saturday

We learned from Joel Hoffman that the first b'rachah (blessing) of Birkat HaMazon (Grace after Meals) is just as problematic as the closing quote that "I've never seen a righteous person hunger, or his children asking for bread" (rough translation, from memory): Does HaShem really provide bread/food for all flesh? One class participant said that HaShem provides, but we humans interfere, due to politics, business decisions, distribution (dis)arrangements, etc., which was an interesting point.
The next session that I attended was the "Women's Rights under Fire in Israel" panel discussion was very enlightening. (My husband studied How Pirkei Avot Can Save Judaism.) Meesh Hammer-Kossoy was upset that the initial television report on the conflict at the Orot Banot girl's school in Beit Shemesh was telecast on a Friday night/Erev Shabbat/Sabbath Eve, thereby making it impossible for the parties directly involved--the Dati Leumi/Religious Zionist community and the fanatics from among the Chareidim/"fervently Orthodox"--to participate in the discussion. Liz Nord said that she's received phone calls quite literally in the middle of the night from Chareidi women who don't dare express their opinions in public, lest their children be declared off-limits as playmates, telling her how grateful they are that the treatment of women in and/or by the Chareidim community is coming under fire. My discussion with Regev Ben-David after the session was, well, awkward. I asked what we in the Galut/Diaspora could do to support tolerance, and, if I understood correctly, he seemed to indicate that the problem was an internal matter to be worked out among Israelis.
After dinner, I went off to try to make sense of International Law and the Arab-Israeli Conflict, which American-Israeli lawyer Anne Herzberg did her best to clarify. Oy. I don't have that much brain-power on a Saturday night. But I seem to recollect that she does think that the blockade of Gaza is legal.

Sunday
We spent most of Sunday at three different Israeli folk dance sessions. It was a good antidote to a day of sitting. :) But we did get to this interesting learning session:

Rachel Friedman's "Deborah: The Power of Prophecy and Song" was pretty powerful stuff. Rachel pointed out that Devorah is one of the very few female Biblical characters whose identity is not tied to any man--she's not a matriach, not a powerful male character's sister, not a queen, not a princess, etc. She served as a leader and judge of her generation before she herself recruited Barak to fight the necessary battle. Like Moshe/Moses, she remains off of the battlefield itself, lending morale and courage. And like Moshe, but unlike his sister Miriam HaN'viah/the Prophet, she begins a song, rather than putting in a short appearance at the end.

Monday

Since my husband had volunteered to staff the Help Desk--Limmud is run entirely by volunteers--and I was keeping him company and attempting to make myself at least semi-useful, we missed almost all of Joel Hoffman's "The Story of Hebrew." More's the pity, because what little we heard sounded fascinating. Joel said that Eliezer Ben Yehudah promoted the Sefardi pronunciation of Hebrew because he didn't want to use the Hebrew pronunciation--Ashkenazi--that he associated with the Eastern European yeshivot. (Yeshiva, roughly translated, means "school of Jewish studies." Contemporary pre-college yeshivot usually offer secular studies, as well.) He also said, if I understood correctly, that there was no proof of which pronunciation of Hebrew that is currently in use is closest to the ancient pronunciation of Hebrew, Yemenite Jewish claims to the contrary notwithstanding.

The last, but most definitely not least (acharon acharon chaviv), session that we attended was Ora Prouser's "Esau's Blessing." Since our son grew up with a number of learning and social-skills challenges and is still hard of hearing, and since I'd just recently concluded that Esav/Eisav had a disability, this topic practically jumped off the web-page when I saw it. Ora had a completely different "take" on the lentil-soup story--she thought that Esav's description was poetic. But she also thought that that story indicated not a language problem, as I'd thought, but a problem in delaying gratification, understanding long-term consequences, and understanding the social world. These challenges, plus the description of Esav as a skilled hunter and a man of the field, led her to believe that Esav had Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. As for my complaint that Yitzchak/Isaac wouldn't give his own son a blessing without being bribed (with a dish of fresh venison), a logical counterclaim was made, which was that Yitzchak wanted to show Esav how much he appreciated the particular skill that Esav had (and that Yaakov did not have). Also impressive was Yitzchak's understanding of Esav's ADHD need for help in organizing tasks--notice how carefully Yitzchak spells out exactly what Esav has to do to prepare the venizon dish. ("Don't forget to take your bow and arrows.") Proof of Esav's inability to interpret social cues was the fact that he didn't realize that his parents would be unhappy with his initial choice of wives, and, even more, his inability to understand that, because he'd previously threatened to kill Yaakov, Yaakov was scared out of his wits at their reunion--Esav may have blurted out that threat on impulse and subsequently forgotten all about it. Altogether, my husband and I found this a most enlightening discussion.

Many thanks also to whoever pointed out that Yaakov/Jacob seems to have had only limited interest in the children of his unloved wife Leah and the concubines, while being practically obsessed with Yosef/Joseph and Binyamin/Benjamin, the sons of his beloved wife Rachel. This may be one logical explanation for his seeming indifference to the rape of Leah's daughter, Dina.

And there you have a taste of the Limmud NY 2012 Conference, Hillel-style (standing on one foot).

Parsha catch-up: Vayechi, Sh'mot, etc., 5772

2012-01-17T10:04:00.023-05:00

Some thoughts from reading Sh'mot this past Shabbat:

Miriam is one gutsy kid--she's not only a slave girl approaching the daughter of Pharaoh, but she's, essentially, backing Bat Pharaoh/Pharaoh's daughter into a corner by suggesting that Bat Par'oh send her to fetch a nursemaid. Note that Bat Par'oh, while showing pity for poor little Moshe/Moses, had not said that she planned to adopt him. (See chapter 2, verses 1-10.)
In Sh'mot/Exodus chapter 2, verse 18, Moshe's future father-in-law is called Reuel; in chapter 3, verse 1, he's called Yitro/Jethro, a classic case of Documentary Hypothesis, in my opinion. New for me this year was noticing that, in chapter 4, verse 18, Yitro is called Yeter, a name whose spelling in the original Hebrew differs by exactly one missing letter. I think that's a simple scribal error, but I would be interested in knowing whether "yeter" exists as an independent word.

Here are some more oldies:

The cunning of politico-econimics: My husband's d'var Torah on the Joseph story
Parshat Vayigash (re favoritism in raising multiple children)
So much for "yeridat ha-dorot" (Yaakov is a bit short on seichel/common sense in raising Yosef)
Yosef HaTzadik? Well, yes and no
My opinion: Yaakov never knew

And note that I've added more links (and "highlights" notes) to Parshat Sh'mot/Shemot (whatever).

Yes, I will, eventually, get around to blogging about Limmud NY 2012, but that may take a bit more time.

Less yacking, more packing: We're off to Limmud!

2012-01-12T18:02:00.001-05:00

Maybe I'll have time to blog while we're there, and maybe not, but I'm sure it'll be a fascinating and fun weekend.

Parshat Sh'mot/Shemot (whatever)

2012-01-12T18:01:00.020-05:00

You can read the basics here.

Here are some oldies of mine, which I tried to line up in chronological order/order of posting. Some of them also include references to future parshiot (parashot?), but I'm posting them here, lest I forget. I'm going to be a bit busy for the next few days.

Sh'mot notes

Highlight:

"Haftarat Sh’mot

. . . For Ashkenazim: I said this years ago in a d’var Torah ("word of Torah," Torah discussion) and I’ll say it again—“For with stammering lips and a strange tongue shall it be spoken to this people” describes the speech of a person with a speech impediment. This may be the sort of thing that’s more likely to catch the eye of the mother of a hard-of-hearing child who spent sixteen years in speech therapy."

Sh'mot notes, 5769

Highlight:
"Call me a faithless coward, but if someone, or even The One, told me to grab a snake by the tail . . ."

Sh'mot notes, 5769--my husband's thoughts

Highlight:
"Parshat B'reishit (the very beginning of the Bible) and Parshat Sh'mot (the beginning of the book of Exodus) are similar in that they squeeze quite a lot into one weekly reading. In Parshat B'reishit, we go from the creation of the world to . .. HaShem's decision to send a flood. In Parshat Sh'mot, we begin with a list of the names of the sons (yes, sons--whatever happened to Dinah, anyway?) of Jacob who went down to Egypt, . . . [and end with Moshe] enduring the complaints of the Hebrew slaves that he'd just made matters worse."

Biblical near-death experiences G-d threatens to kill first Yitzchak/Isaac, then Moshe/Moses, and later, Bil'am.
Moshe's first act of disobedience "HaShem specifically tells Moshe (Moses) to tell Par'oh (Pharaoh) that HaShem intends to slay Par'oh's firstborn."
G-d lied He told Moshe that his brother Aharon/Aaron would be his spokeperson before Pharaoh, but that never happened.
Parsha catch-up: Vayechi and Sh'mot

How "modesty" turns women into sex objects (Forward)

2012-01-12T13:43:00.013-05:00

Debra Nussbaum Cohen said it better than I could. (And better than I did.)

Sigh. Even in prehistoric 2007, some Chareidim didn't understand how offensive to women their attitudes were--see A Simple Jew's Shmiras Einayim Forum. (It took considerable hunting to find that post, and even more to find my reaction post, Moderation in Modesty.)

With apologies to Robert Frost . . .

2012-01-09T11:02:00.005-05:00

. . . I'm considering embarking on "the road not taken," Jewish-style. See the comments.

Parshat Vayechi

2012-01-05T12:44:00.006-05:00

You can read the basics here.

And here's an oldie but goodie of mine regarding the B'nei Yaakov/B'nai Yaakov/Sons of Jacob (and yes, I do mean "sons") that'll take you right through the end of this week's parsha.

Have an easy and meaningful fast.

Yes, Virginia, there's such a thing as too discrete

2011-12-30T13:13:00.019-05:00

Start here, and don't forget to read the comments.

I did, in fact, buy myself a camisole (in a modest style that, naturally, the vendor no longer sells). But I ran into the problem that a lingerie saleswoman had once explained, which is that women's "basics" are generally made for the majority of women who are taller than I. Consequently, we shorties have no choice but to tighten the straps (or have them shortened)--and when the straps stretch, the garment no longer fits properly. After a number of months, I found myself pulling the camisole way down in the back to force it to stay up in the front.

So I gave up and bought myself a couple of sleeveless cotton tank tops. This style is just about perfect. The non-stretch straps hide that other set of straps, and anything else above the "support system" that I don't want to flash in public, while still being barely low-cut enough, if I tug the tank down a smidge in front, to remain hidden under those blouses of mine that have a lower second button. (I refuse to choke myself by buttoning all the way up, but neither will I leave more than one button unbuttoned.) Since I bought the tank tops in "Light Eggplant," a pale purple (no longer available, naturally), they're also practically invisible even when worn under a white blouse, while still hiding the view completely.

Unfortunately, that near-invisibility creates a different problem--if the blouse gaps open between buttons, it's almost impossible to tell that what's directly under it is a tank top, not just my bare skin. I give up. This tzniut/modesty business is more complicated than I thought.

'Twas the night after Chanukah (oops):1 more video

2011-12-29T21:59:00.008-05:00

Here's another Chanukah video, slightly after the fact--this one's a rockabilly Sevivon, by Mark Skier (aka Psycho Toddler) and his Moshe Skier Band.

I decided several months ago, after careful consideration, that, during my year of aveilut/mourning for my father, I would listen to recorded music and music videos, but would not go to live music concerts or theatrical performances. Thus far, I've missed a Pharaoh's Daughter concert, a Soul Farm and Moshav Band concert, a Shlock Rock concert . . . Sigh. Well, aveilut isn't supposed to be fun.

I'm getting sick from minyan

2011-12-29T09:55:00.023-05:00

No, that's not a mistake--I'm sick from minyan, not sick of minyan.

My father died in early June. By June 10, I was commuting to ye olde "kaddish minyan" again. Less than a month later, I got a cold bad enough to keep me out of work for several days.

Fast-forward several months. In early December, I was out sick with a cold again. I gave myself a couple of weeks to recover, then returned to minyan on the first day of Chanukah. Sure enough, by the seventh day, I had a sore throat.

My unfortunate conclusion: We won't be able to move to our friends' delightful Jewish neighborhood, full of kosher restaurants (meat and dairy), kosher grocery stores, and synagogues (here's theirs), all within easy walking distance of one another, until after I retire, because having to wake up at least 45 minutes earlier every weekday for the longer commute would wreak havoc on my health. (I'm waking up an hour early to go to minyan.) The next best alternative is a neighborhood with a commute only about 10 minutes longer than my current commute. There are enough Jews there to sustain an eruv, but, sadly, living within walking distance of a synagogue there will probably put us about a 20-minute walk (with shopping cart) from the nearest kosher grocery store. Oh, well. On the plus side, some of the local kosher restaurants deliver. It's almost impossible to get kosher food delivered to our current neighborhood, unless you're an institution ordering in large quantity (or you're willing to settle for whatever you can get from kosher.com or freshdirect, neither of which sells kosher swiss cheese).

Parshat Vayigash: Torah's cliffhanger resolved

2011-12-28T13:36:00.010-05:00

You can read the basics here.

I read this parsha every year, and it still brings tears to my eyes when Yehudah (Judah) pleads with Yosef (Joseph) to let him take Binyamin's (Benjamin's) place as a slave, lest their father die of a broken heart (B'reishit/Genesis chapter 44, verses 18-34).

Portraits of the reunion of Yosef and Binyamin that show Binyamin as a teenager are a bit off, since Binyamin is described later in the parsha as already having children of his own.

The haftarah, Ezekiel 37:15-28, is a real beauty, speaking of the reunion of the Northern Kingdom, Israel/Yisrael, and the Southern Kingdom, Judea/Judah/Yehudah. Halevai (rough translation--it should only happen), we should live to see a reunion of Am Yisrael/The Jewish People, and an end to sinat chinam/baseless hatred within our community.

On a lighter note . . .

2011-12-28T10:49:00.004-05:00

Three-year-old girl rants about toy marketing practices enforcing traditional gender roles. It's hard to tell how much of this was staged by Riley's parents and how much was her own initiative, but the kid certainly does look and sound genuinely ticked off.

Fighting for the soul of Israel (the People & State)

2011-12-27T13:00:00.025-05:00

See this important news from or about Israel:

Jameel's Fighting for the soul of Beit Shemesh (I strongly recommend that you watch the first video, to see what today's demonstration's about.)
Jewish Daily Forward's Thousands to protest treatment of women
Haaretz's Ultra-Orthodox Jews ask Israeli media to help rid them of extremists

Over 30 years ago, when we first visited Israel, my husband expressed his concern that, if Israel's enemies ever left it alone, there'd be a civil war. What neither of us ever expected was that the civil war might not be simply chilonim (secular Jews) vs. datiim ("religious" Jews), but also datiim vis. datiim. That some extremists among the Chareidi ("fervently Orthodox") would wage a verbal war of intimidation against more "modern" Orthodox Jews has really come to us as something of a shock.

The Dati Leumi (Religious Zionist) and more moderate Chareidi communities certainly have their work cut out for them in trying to limit the damage caused by both religious and relio-political extremists. I wish them luck, because I think that whatever happens in the State of Israel will (continue to) influence Jewish communities abroad, as well. And I don't want to live in a Jewish world in which eight-year-old Jewish girls are called whores for wearing knee-covering skirts and shoulder-covering, high-necked tops that most "normal" people would consider modest.

I stand by what I wrote--I still think that the obsession with tzniut/modesty is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011 update:

I guess there are enough Jews in New York City for the New York Times to publish an article on the subject--see their Israeli Girl, 8, at Center of Tension Over Religious Extremism.

Shlissel (Key) Challah: The Loaf of Idolatry? (Jameel)

2011-12-27T10:10:00.000-05:00

- Rabbi Moshe Ben-Chaim19 of Mesora.Org [orthodox] teaches that:

The Torah teaches that Hashem punishes the wicked, and rewards the righteous. It does not say that challah baking or any other activity will help address our needs…When the matriarchs were barren, they did not resort to segulas, but introspected and prayed…Nothing in Torah supports this concept of segula; Torah sources reject the idea of a segula…baking challas with brachos cannot help…segulas are useless, and violate the Torah prohibition of Nichush [good luck charms]. It does not matter if the charm is a rabbit‘s foot, a horseshoe, a challah, key or a red bendel. The practice assumes that forces exist, which do not, and it is idolatrous."

Jameel of the Muqata has put together a nice screed against segulot/"lucky charm" objects or actions.

Awkward moments

2011-12-26T15:26:00.005-05:00

Shabbat/Sabbath (Saturday) morning

The congregant not only didn't remember that it was her brother's yahrzeit, she didn't even remember that she'd had a brother. Her non-Jewish aide stood in her stead while the Kaddish Yatom/Mourner's Kaddish prayer was recited.

Shabbat afternoon
Another congregant's mental capacities have been declining noticeably in recent months. We have to be careful to remind him what time services will take place, lest he show up two hours late and miss the whole thing. But his behavior at Minchah/Afternoon Service still surprised us considerably. Our congregation may now count women for a minyan, but we're still a traditional enough synagogue not to allow the use of musical instruments on Shabbat or Yom Tov (major holidays). So you can imagine how taken aback we were when this fellow pulled a harmonica out of his pocket and began playing it in the middle of Minchah/Afternoon Service. At first, we tried to shush him, but it quickly became apparent that he had no idea that he was doing anything unacceptable. So, not wishing to embarrass him in public, we told him how nicely he was playing, and, since he was clearly pleased at his idea to play the harmonica for us, complimented him on his talent.

Sad.

Sunday morning
It's a good thing I got to minyan on time yesterday. Just after we finished reciting the Birkot HaShachar/Morning Blessings, I snuck across the aisle, tapped a guy on the shoulder, and whispered, "You might want to get your kippah out from under your tefillin strap." (According to halachah/Jewish religious law, tefillin must rest directly on the body, with no clothing intervening.) As it happens, my friendly warning saved the man from a more public embarrassment--it turned out that he was the one who'd been given the honor of leading the matbeiah/required part of the service, and he would, no doubt, have been stopped and publicly corrected if he'd gone up to the amud/reading stand with his kippah stuck under the strap of his shel rosh/head tefillin. I haven't forgotten the time they stopped a guy who'd just started to recite the Chatzi Kaddish prayer before the Musaf Amidah prayer on a Rosh Chodesh/New Month because he'd forgotten to remove his tefillin first, as is required.

Sunday evening
I was the only person at the Chanukah party who was reciting b'rachot/blessings over the food before eating, covering my mouth in the hope that I wouldn't be too obvious. Oy.

Parshat Miketz: Reuven said what?!

2011-12-26T13:02:00.010-05:00

You can read the basics here.

B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 42, verse 37:

"37 And Reuben spoke unto his father, saying: 'Thou shalt slay my two sons, if I bring him [Benjamin] not to thee; deliver him into my hand, and I will bring him back to thee.'"

First of all, if Yaakov's/Jacob's son Yosef/Joseph was already presumed by his father to be dead, and then Binyamin/Benjamin was taken from him, as well, of what possible benefit would it have been to Yaakov to have had two of his grandsons killed?

Second, where did Reuven get the unmitigated chutzpah/gall to offer the lives of two innocents as payment for a "crime" that they had not committed?

In my opinion, this was an impulsive, stupid, and immoral proposal. It's no wonder that Reuven didn't become the leader of the family.

Some oldies but goodies of mine:

Rabbi Riskin's "Hanukkah letter to the hilltop youth"

2011-12-22T10:00:00.005-05:00

To the “price tag” radicals, who’re making innocent people pay a price for attacks by others:

“You have turned the term "settler" into a dirty word. You have caused me to be ashamed . . . to be called by the same name as those whose love for the land has turned into hatred of human beings.“

Recommended reading.

Some Chanukah videos

2011-12-21T21:44:00.028-05:00

The Fountainheads: Light up the Night. For those whom it may concern, this group of instrumentalists, singers, and dancers includes both men and women, and some of the women sing solos. (All members are graduates or students of the Ein Prat Israeli Academy for Leadership, which sounds like a wonderful place.)
Maccabeats: Miracle. Here's their Chanukah video from last year. (The following link is slightly after the fact, but I liked their Rosh HaShanah video particularly.)
Six13: Chanukah Rights! An amusing parody.

I can't watch any of these at the office because those grinches block YouTube. Oh, well. Chanukah Sameach/Happy Chanukah.

Whoa, hold everything--here's the original version of Miracle, by Matisyahu (before his recent literal close shave, with beard still intact).

Thursday, December 29, 2012:

'Twas the night after Chanukah (oops!) . . . Well, if I plunk the video link into this post, at least I'll know where to find it next Chanukah. Here's a rockabilly Sevivon, by Mark Skier (aka Psycho Toddler) and his Moshe Skier Band.

For your Chanukah entertainment

2011-12-21T16:00:00.002-05:00

Here are some oldies but goodies, recorded before the foot surgery and the two broken wrists. Enjoy!

The Tortoise and the Hare go to minyan

2011-12-21T10:06:00.034-05:00

I think the reason why my husband gets more upset than I do when we're 5-10 minutes late for a weekday morning minyan is that, since he's a faster Hebrew reader than I am, he can finish all of P'sukei D'Zimrah if we get there on time, whereas I could never recite all of P'sukei D'Zimrah, even if we got there 5-10 minutes early!

To compensate for my slow Hebrew, I do a lot of praying before I ever get to minyan. I recite the Birkot HaTorah (Torah blessings), Birkot HaShachar (Morning Blessings), and Rabbi Yishmael at home, plus Psalm 30 (Mizmor, Shir Chanukat HaBayit , L'David), Baruch ShehAmar, Ashrei (Psalm 145), and Yishtabach on the subway, adding another psalm or two if I have time. Since I've already prayed the "minimum requirement" for the early part of the service before I get there, I can live with walking in at the beginning of the congregation's recital of Ashrei because that gives me just enough time to put on my tallit and lay tefillin before Bar'chu.

My husband, on the other hand, prays the whole service during the service, not before or after. (I do a ton of minyan-not-required davvening/praying on the subway-ride home, too.) So, naturally, if we get there late, he feels deprived of his prayer opportunity.

He's right, of course. I really should make more of an effort to get to minyan on time.

See also:

Parshat Vayshev, continued: More re Tamar

2011-12-20T10:07:00.006-05:00

I guess I have more to say about Vayeshev. Start with this good commentary by Irit Koren.

I've been thinking that the story of Tamar is the "antidote" to the story of the rape of Dinah. In that story, we never once hear from Dinah herself. Everything is done to her, or, allegedly, for her, but nothing whatsover is done by her. Tamar, on the other hand, takes matters into her own hands, risking death in the process. Hmm, maybe I should read Subversive Sequels in the Bible again.

Don’t Tax the Rich. Tax Inequality Itself. (NY Times)

2011-12-20T09:49:00.000-05:00

Worth a read--and worth a try.

Another good reason why we should move

2011-12-16T10:10:00.014-05:00

Start with my A lesson in Middle Eastern politics learned from parenting.

Then read my Revenge of the downstairs neighbors, which is much shorter.

I always said that, if the downstairs neighbors couldn't stand the noise from an upstairs child, they had no business living in an apartment. This is particulary true for anyone living in an apartment with more than one bedroom. Since it's likely that a multiple-bedroom apartment will house a family, there's always the chance that one of the family members might be a noisy kid running around over your head.

I concluded recently that following my own opinion might be necessary for my health.

A little background is in order, for my out-of-town readers: New York City has, basically, two kinds of apartments, known as "pre-war" and "post-war." Pre-war apartments were built before World War II, when quality construction was, apparently, still standard. Post-war apartments, on the other hand . . . Let me put it this way: When my husband sneezes, our neighbors can probably hear him not only next door, but two floors away. While some of the "better" apartments are now built with better sound insulation, ours is most certainly not one of them.

Which brings me to the kid upstairs: After months of listening to the little heck-raiser tearing around the apartment, it finally dawned on us that something was missing--we weren't hearing any adult footsteps. Believe me, every time the late upstairs neighbor took a step, I heard it. This can mean only one thing--the toddler doesn't live on the floor above us, he/she lives two floors above us!

Holy Moses! If that's what a toddler sounds like from two floors away, it's no wonder our former downstairs neighbors couldn't tolerate our kid's commotion!

So I told my husband that we now have another good reason to move--we have to "trade down" to a one-bedroom apartment.

Ever the CPA, my husband reminded that, in this rotten economy, there's no guarantee that a family with kids wouldn't be forced to settle for a one-bedroom apartment. Sigh. Where's a pair of alte geezers who are too broke to buy a house and don't want to move to a retirement community supposed to live, to get a little peace and quiet?

I'm afraid to think about what the noise level is likely to be when the vacant apartment upstairs is finally sold.

Electronic annoyances

2011-12-15T11:40:00.011-05:00

I plug my Nook into the outlet and charge it fully. But I'm too tired to read on the subway for a few days, and am lucky enough to get a seat to snooze in. Several days later, I try reading from the Nook. It refuses to turn on, displaying a note that there's insufficient power.

Same thing with my iPod.

As with every other old-fashioned battery-powered device, these gadgets lose their charge, even when not being used.

You would think that all those tech geeks could have come up with a power system more efficient than the one in a flashlight. :(

This post is the latest addition to my "design" series.

Parshat Vayeshev

2011-12-14T12:34:00.017-05:00

You can read the basics here.

Here are some oldies of mine:

I've said it before and I've say it again: "Tamar was nearly burned alive by Yehudah for committing the same sex act that Yehudah had committed, indicating that our Biblical ancestors thought that it was perfectly acceptable to seek a prostitute, but not to be one." Yes, I know I sound like the 21st-century western female that I am. So sue me.

Update, Thursday, December 15, 2011:
I forgot to mention the devious brothers--not only did they sell Yosef into slavery, they politely "forgot" to mention this to their brother Reuven, who had hoped to rescue him, leaving poor Reuven to believe that Yosef was dead, or, at best, kidnapped. Presumably, that was deliberate, since Reuven might very well have felt obligated, as the oldest son, to tell their father Yaakov/Jacob the truth, if he'd know it.

An Israeli "home-style" restaurant in New York City

2011-12-13T09:58:00.025-05:00

I got my first surprise when I asked what was the soup of the day.

"Kreplack soup?! I would hardly have expected such an Ashkenazi dish in an Israeli restaurant."

The guy behind the counter just smiled.

My second surprise came when the soup didn't.

"What happened to my soup?"

"You'll have to be patient. It'll take about five minutes."

This restaurant may look like a fast-food restaurant, but apparently, they don't believe in making food fast.

A further surprise awaited me when I bit into my first krepl (wonton/meat ravioli/meat perogi/dumpling/whatever): It had pepper in it! My Russian-American grandmother's kreplach never had pepper in them!

Yep, these were Israeli kreplach, all right!

As a general rule, neither my tongue nor my tummy has a particularly high tolerance for pepper. Fortunately, the kreplach and equally-peppery soup barely snuck in under my tolerance limit, or my husband would have ended up eating two bowls of soup! Equally fortunately, neither my baby-chicken shwarma--much less fatty than red-meat shwarma, which is usually too greasy for me to eat--nor the smidge of my husband's beef kofta kabab that I snitched had any pepper in or on them, and were delicious.

But more surprises were in store.

Two guys, both bareheaded, walked into the restaurant. One of them touched the mezuzah with his hand, then kissed his hand. I haven't seen that manoeuver from a bareheaded man since I left my bareheaded father's house.

The pièce de résistance, though, was the Chassidic man seated at a table with a teenage girl and boy, both in denim pants. Glatt for him, jeans for them. That was a delightful picture of family love and loyalty overcoming differences of haskafah/religious perspective.

Parshat Vayishlach--old and new thoughts

2011-12-10T21:16:00.022-05:00

Sorry I'm late, but Iwas so loaded up with assignments at the office last week that I didn't have time to read the parsha 'til after Kabbalat Shabbat/Maariv.

Here's a link to the basics.

Old thoughts

Here's an oldie but goodie of mine, Vayishlach: A family of con artists benefits from a rape. Note especially the comment speculating that Dinah's rape may have been "statutory"--we don't really know how old she was, and the commenter speculates that she may actually have been a little girl going out to play.
I don't blame Esau/Esav for coming with 400 men to meet his brother Jacob/Yaakov--see my Midrash Madness.

New thoughts

Much has been made of the fact that Dinah went out alone, but much of the blame has been placed on Dinah herself. I'd flip that blame on its head: If it was dangerous for a female to go anywhere unescorted, why the heck could none of Dinah's 10 older brothers--or any of Yaakov's servants, if the boys were too young--find a free minute to accompany her? As my husband speculated, did Yaakov and/or his sons expect this poor girl/woman with no sisters to be content never to have any contact with other girls/women of her own age?
In the commentary to the Hertz Chumash, Rabbi Joseph Hertz notes that B'reishit/Genesis chapter 34, verse 7 , " . . . he had wrought a vile deed in Israel in lying with Jacob's daughter. . ." is problematic: " in Israel" . . . is strictly an anachronism," because Israel, referring here to the Jewish People, did not exist until after the Exodus from Egypt. Until then, we can talk about B'nei (the Children of) or Bet/Beit/Beth/pick-your-transliteration (the House of) Yisrael (Israel, meaning Jacob), but not about Yisrael/Israel as a people. Hertz fudges over the issue by describing "a vile deed in Israel" as " . . . the reflection of Scripture on the incident . . . " Huh? I call Documentary Hypothesis on this phrase, which, in my opinion, was clearly written later.

Fashion fiascos # 2

2011-12-05T09:42:00.001-05:00

The original is here.

You mean to tell me that some men actually pay for a "stubble trimmer" to get the same look that my husband gets for free every time he forgets to shave?

I suppose that a man having a "stubble beard" is no dumber than a woman wearing six-inch stiletto heels.

An interesting holiday weekend

2011-11-30T16:15:00.026-05:00

Now that I have a minute to spare--I've been up to my ears in typing-editing-formatting assignments, recently--I just wanted to mention what an interesting Thanksgiving Day weekend we had.

Saved by the, er, minyan
This year, it happened that, after speaking with friends from three different households, all of whom had family obligations on Thanksgiving, we found ourselves comtemplating making reservations for Thanksgiving dinner at a kosher restaurant. But then I ran into an old buddy of ours at my "kaddish minyan," which he sometimes attends when not helping another shul get a minyan.

It helped that I know he enjoys cooking.

"What are you doing for Thanksgiving, having everyone and his cousin over for dinner?"

He didn't miss a beat, bless him. "Yeah, you wanna come?"

It was a most unusual Thanksgiving dinner--since our host and hostess don't like turkey, they cooked up enough chicken to feed an army, with a white-potato dish instead of stuffing. The cooks among the guests brought homemade cranberry sauce, homemade parve pumpkin pie, and homemade parve muffins. The non-cooks--namely, us--walked in with store-bought parve sugar cookies and parve chocolate almonds bought from a kosher store, not from Fairway. (Note to self: Remember to bring those sugar cookies often, 'cause they like 'em.) We all stuffed ourselves silly.

It got more interesting after dinner, when the hosts' child handed out those tiny bottles made of chocolate and filled with liqueur. Chocolate? Liqueur? These ingredients opened the door to some major kashrut questions, and led to a "he said, she said" story.

He said: "They're kosher."

She said: "I'm not so sure."

So I said: "Let me see the box."

Long story short: They weren't even kosher, much less pareve.

Our hosts cook kosher meat only and have separate dishes. But this isn't the first time that we've had to deal with a dairy/chalavi dessert after a fleishig/b'sari (meat/poultry) meal in their home. I don't get it. And one time, when I asked whether the dessert was parve, the host got downright insulted. I concluded that we should always bring our own parve dessert to their home rather than risk causing offense simply by asking that question.

This reminds me of another friend who also keeps a kosher kitchen, but serves dairy desserts only an hour after a meat meal. I don't think she's of Dutch ancestry, so I don't understand why she follows the Dutch tradition of waiting only one hour between meat and dairy when most folks follow either the three- or six-hour traditions. Again, we just bring our own parve dessert.

Bringing a parve dessert also helps in situations in which we're not sure that our hosts understand even the basic rules of kashrut.*

Moral of the story: Don't make a scene, just bring your own.

I wish we all had our hang-ups :(
One of our would-have-been hosts for Thanksgiving dinner invited us to what she dubbed a "Thanksgiving Sheini" (Second Thanksgiving) dinner on Sunday because she wanted to have a turkey dinner with friends after having fulfilled family obligations. The food was great--our hostess is a wonderful cook--but some of the other guests were not so much so. One guest not only made several cell-phone calls during the meal, but even put on a pair of earphones right at the dinner table just to listen to some sports event. How rude can you get?

Look, if you want to spend your time on the phone and/or watching or listening to a sports event, do all of us a favor and just stay home.

*See also: Milk and meat mix-ups, or the missing-mashgiach mishaps--(mis)adventures in kashrut

Parshat Vayetz: A baby-making competition

2011-11-30T14:25:00.013-05:00

You can read the details here.

Here's last year's version, with links to two other posts of mine and one by DovBear.

I can only comment that much of B'reishit/Genesis seems to illustrate what can transpire when a woman's worth is calculated almost exclusively based on the number of babies that she births or "adopts"--you end up with a barren woman telling her husband that, if she doesn't have a baby, she might as well be dead (B'reishit/Genesis chapter 30, verse 1). Personally, I find Rachel's story quite sad.

Parshat Toldot: Disabled persons on our family tree?

2011-11-23T12:39:00.025-05:00

You can reach the basics here.

Here are some of my Toldot oldies:

Here's a new thought: Was Esau/Eisav/Esav learning disabled? He couldn't actually name the pottage/stew, calling it "that red red stuff" (ha-adom ha-adom ha-zeh), and didn't seem to have understood the value of a birthright (until later, after he'd sold it). (See B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 25, verses 30-32).

And here's an old-new thought, something that I've heard for years: Some say that Yitzchak/Isaac was developmentally disabled. There are points both in support of that theory and opposed. On the one hand, Yitzchak seems to have gone along with his father's plan to sacrifice him, he's the only patriarch who needed massive "shadchan*" intervention in order to get married, and he was deceived into misidentifying his own younger son by a simple placement of animal skins on the smooth-skinned son's arms and neck. On the other hand, he seems to have had some business sense. Your call.

*shadchan = matchmaker

Fun with the OU & the OK: Checking for bugs

2011-11-22T13:12:00.033-05:00

Here's the short version from the Orthodox Union/OU. (That's the link I couldn't find when I wrote Food News 2.) While you're there, let's go to the video. (Here's another OU bug-hunting video that's less talk and more demonstration.)

From the OU's PDF, here are the instructions regarding broccoli:

Fresh broccoli, stems: Wash thoroughly.
Fresh broccoli, whole: Parboil for no more than 1 minute. Segregate each head individually. Look carefully at the branched area of each floret, in the crevice formed by two branches forking out from a singletrunk like a Y; spread apart each floret head and look through the florets, into the branch area; if 1 or 2 insects are found, continue examining the remaining sections of head; if 3 insects are found, the entire head should be discarded.

It gets better, folks (quoth she sarcastically)--here's the OK Kosher Certification organization's PDF re checking for bugs, and below are their instructions regarding broccoli:

Frozen Broccoli
Needs an acceptable kosher symbol (Bodek, Eden and
Golden Glow are acceptable with a kosher symbol on
the box).
Fresh Broccoli
Only Stems May Be Used.
Wash thoroughly. No further checking is necessary.

So, according to the OU, anyone with manual-dexterity limitations, vision problems, or lack of time and/or patience can't really check their fresh-broccoli florets "properly," and according to the OK, no one should even try.

Yep, when in doubt, throw it out.

Isn't bal tashchit also a mitzvah?!

And what about financial considerations? Have some of us gone overboard just because we can now afford to do so (allegedly)? Could our ancestors in the shtetlach of Eastern Europe or the parched lands of the Middle East have afforded simply to throw out half their produce?

Is there anyone who actually believes that our ancestors, when out picking wild blueberries (a) "open[ed] and inspect[ed] each berry for maggots,"or (a) could actually either find or afford enough sugar to "Sprinkle sugar on berries," and (b) had the ability, even as recently as maybe 90 years ago, to "refrigerate for a few hours" to see whether any maggots would come out for a snack?

The Hillel version (standing on one foot): Is all this really necessary, or even preferable? Whatever happened to common sense? When it comes to kashrut, modern technology may be a double-edge sword--just because we can do this, must we?

See also Bugged.

Curses, fooled again*: A catalog-shopper's lament

2011-11-22T09:52:00.004-05:00

What good does it do that all of my favorite clothing catalogs are having sales when everything I want is already sold out? :(

*See "Curses, foiled again," and enjoy the linked video parody of "The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle," itself a parody.

Fairway-shoppers' kashrut alert: Parve becomes dairy

2011-11-21T11:25:00.002-05:00

Since we were cleaning out Fairway yesterday, we thought we'd be nice and buy an extra box of kosher-pareve chocolate-covered almonds for our fellow and sister Israeli folk dancers. Imagine my dismay when one of the dancers pointed out that the hechsher on the almonds specified OK D(airy), not pareve, even though I distinctly remembered that I'd been buying those nuts because they were pareve. Was my memory really that far gone?

The good news is that, when we got home, I checked our remaining box of Fairway-brand chocolate-covered almonds, and they were, in fact, labeled pareve. The bad news is that both boxes of almonds that we bought last night are labeled dairy. I strongly advise those of my readers who shop at (any branch of) Fairway to check the labels on their Fairway-brand snack and/or dessert items to ensure that what they think is pareve is, in fact, still pareve!

DovBear on resurrection: Originally a Jewish idea?

2011-11-17T12:52:00.003-05:00

See here and here. Did Yitzchak/Isaac actually die at the time of the Akeidah/Binding of Isacc and was he resurrected by G-d, and, if so, did the Christians take the idea of resurrection from us (or did we and the Christians borrow it from pagan traditions)?

Parshat Chayei Sarah

2011-11-16T12:35:00.027-05:00

You can read the basics here.

Here's my 2010 post on Chayei Sarah (with links). Here's my 2004 version.

And here's a thought from my Parshat Vayera: Something old, something new:

" why does Sarah disappear from the text? Where is her reward for having ensured the perpetuation of Avraham's lineage by offering her handmaid as a surrogate mother? Where is her reward for having waited over a decade after the birth of her handmaid's son to have a son of her own? Where is her reward for having saved Avraham's life twice--and enriched him in the process--by allowing herself to be passed off as only his sister and not his wife? Her reward is to have G-d, with her husband's cooperation, threaten the life of her only child? My own midrash: No wonder she dies in the next parshah--if this is her reward, why live?"

Some new thoughts:

I don't remember where I heard or read this, but someone commented that Avraham showed more respect for Sarah after her death than he'd shown for her while she was alive. Sadly, I think one could make a case (see B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 23) for that.
In B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 24, verse 16, Rachel is described as "b'tulah, v'ish lo y'daah," a virgin, and no man had "known" her. Is this just an example of what's sometimes called "biblical parallelism" (and might less poetically be known as the Bible's tendency to repeat itself?), or is it true, as I've heard, that "b'tulah" really means simply a woman who's never been married?
Why did Rachel fall (va-tipol) off of her camel when she saw Yitzchak/Isaac (see 24:64)? Was he really that good-lookin'? :)

Update, Saturday, November 19, 2011, 9:13 PM

Rachel fell off her camel before she inquired as to the identity of the man whom she saw in the field. Was it customary in the ancient Near East for a woman to dismount from her "ride" in the presence of a man of her own social class?
Interestingly, much of the story of Rachel's encounter with Avraham's servant would be, for all practical purposes, impossible in current Chareidi (fervently Orthodox) society, in which, especially for an unmarried person, speaking to just about any person of the opposite gender other than one's parent is considered scandalous behavior.

Food news 2

2011-11-14T17:07:00.009-05:00

Here's the original.

Glatt gluten, so to speak
I recently noticed that the lentils that I've been buying, which have a hechsher (symbol indicating that it's kosher), also have a notice stating that the package contains soy and wheat. Oy. I have two friends who can't eat wheat, and another one who can't eat any grain containing gluten. Fortunately, Larry and Malka Esther Lennhoff were kind enough to refer me to KosherQuest's No Certification Needed page, which states that dried beans do not need rabbinical supervision. I can only hope that any lentils I buy in the future, be they with or without a hechsher, don't contain gluten if the package doesn't list gluten--I don't know how strict the law is regarding allergen-listing.

Bugging out 2: My more recent reading
Naturally, I can't find it now, but last week I saw an online chart from the Orthodox Union giving a standing-on-one-foot version of how to check certain fruits and vegetables for insects, etc. According to the chart, one must worry about beans being worm-infested. Say what?! Now, not only do I have to worry about my lentils being gluten-free, I also have to soak them for half an hour and throw out whichever beans float to the top, if I remember correctly.

Worse yet, you should have seen the instructions for checking fresh broccoli--you're supposed to boil the florets briefly, then open them up and check for bugs in every place where two branches meet. Judging by the comments to Food News 1 (and some quotes from previous posts and comments that I included therein), there are differences of opinion within the Orthodox community as to how strict one must be in checking food for bugs. That's certainly good news. If every Orthodox Jew followed the current veggie-checking rules to the letter, it would be a wonder if any Orthodox Jew ever eat fresh vegetables and/or fresh fruit at all. Were our ancestors nearly as obsessed about insects in food, or is this something new under the sun?

Is there a mandoline in my future?
I follow a link from this "carnivals" post by Ilana-Davita to This American Bite's Kosher Cooking Carnival, where this recipe for Zucchini Pasta caught my eye, not only because of the ingredients but also because of the gadget displayed in the post--I'd never heard of a julienne peeler. Wow--you mean I could julienne veggies for stir-frying without buying another attachment for the food processor, which is hardly worth the effort of cleaning when you're cooking for only two? So I zipped over to ye friendly housewares store and procured myself a julienne peeler. Unfortunately, my new kitchen gadget has a safety cover for when it's not in use, but not for when it is in use. I'm seriously concerned that, unless I pay careful attention every second that I'm using this utensil, it might julienne my finger along with the carrot. Could any of my culinarily-gifted readers recommend an alternative that's equally easy to use and clean but safer?

A serious kashering problem?
My poor husband, trying to do the right thing by making Shabbat dinner this past early-sundown Friday, forgot that the pasta he was cooking--ravioli--contained cheese, and cooked it in a parve pot. In the good old days, this would not have been a big deal--we would simply have boiled up the pot and the lid and taken them back to parve. Our newest pot, however, has a tempered-glass lid, as is true of many pots nowadays. How on earth can one kasher a lid with a metal rim (which one kashers by boiling), a hard plastic knob ((which one also kashers by boiling), and a tempered-glass main section (kashered by soaking in cold water for three days?)? Sure, we can kasher one of our old dairy pots (with a metal lid) and make it parve, but what's going to to happen the next time we make a mistake? Advise needed. I'm sending this one to my "G-d Squad," in the hope that my rabbinical and/or cantorial acquaintances will be able to assist us.

Oh, by the way, see the first comment here, and add a few, if you'd like.

Parshat Vayera: Tons to write about

2011-11-10T13:27:00.033-05:00

. . . but not much time.

Here's a link to the basics.

Speaking of links, I've written plenty of posts about Parshat Vayera, since there's not much missing from it. :)

Quick notes:

I read somewhere that Lot's daughters must have known that they were not the only survivors because they were able to procure wine somewhere. On one hand, I think they might have carried it with them when they fled from Tz'dom/Sodom (Sodom). On the other hand, they'd been to Tzoar/Zoar, and surely must have known that there were other survivors. Methinks they were more afraid of getting stuck with their father in the mountains until he died and/or they were too old to have children.

Also, welcoming guests/travelers seems to have been of paramount importance to our ancestors.

I'm outta here--Shabbat Shalom!

Update, 9:29 PM, Sat., Nov. 12, 2011:

I never noticed before that HaShem never actually told Avraham/Abraham that He was planning to destroy Tz'dom and Amorah/Sodom and Gomorrah). (See B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 18, verses 16-21.)
I also never noticed before that Lot had four daughters, namely two unmarried ones and two married ones. Otherwise, he couldn't have (a) offered the townsmen two virgins and (b) spoken to his sons-in-law. (See chapter 19, verses 8 and 14 here.)
While we're on the subject of Tz'dom, I think the real sin of Tz'dom was not homosexual behavior (for which HaShem had not yet stated any prohibition), but attempted gang rape (see chapter 19, verse 5).
Alas, poor Yishmael/Ishmael. He turned out better than one might expect, for a kid who was tossed out of his father's house at the age of roughly 15 with nothing but a day's lunch. (See chapter 9-14.) As I said last year, "He [Avraham] shows hospitality to total strangers, yet sends his son Yishmael packing with nothing but bread and water. All HaShem said was "Sh'ma b'kolah," listen to her (Sarah's) voice. HaShem never suggested that Yishmael and his mother Hagar should be sent off into the desert with limited means of short-term survival and no means of long-term support. Judging by the text, Yishmael had to have been over 14 years old at the time of his expulsion. Avraham could have given him a parting gift of, for example, a small flock of goats. Why didn't he?"
So let me get this straight--HaShem orders Avraham to sacrifice Yitzchak/Isaac, but an angel tells him not to?!!! (See chapter 22, verses 1-3 and 11-12.) I'm not impressed with either HaShem's command or Avraham's willingness to go along with it. For openers, "Why on earth (or in heaven) would HaShem want to stoop to the level of a pagan god and demand child sacrifice?" For closers, as I said last year, "Why is Avraham nicer to strangers than to his own family? He argues repeatedly with G-d not to destroy S'dom and Amorah (Sodom and Gemorah), but says not a word when G-d tells him to sacrifice his son Yitzchak."

My husband's the nicer one of us

2011-11-08T09:24:00.026-05:00

This past Friday night, we were invited by a local Jewish group to join some of our Jewish neighbors for a Shabbat/Sabbath dinner. Boy, were we surprised by what transpired.

Our hosts offered the guests three bottles of wine, none of which was kosher. To make matters even more interesting, there wasn't an uncut loaf of bread to be had. For lack of an alternative, we ended up making kiddush over orange juice (with a change of b'rachah/blessing to "sheh-ha-kol") and motzi (the b'rachah thanking HaShem for bread) over two slices of bread from the package that had a hechsher on it.

On the way home, I commented to my husband that I was surprised that a family that's so active in one of the local synagogues (not ours) would be so unaware of the traditional way to perform the Erev Shabbat/Sabbath Eve home rituals. His response was that this was a good learning experience for them. I had to agree, and to note that our hosts seem to be members in good standing of the B'nei u-V'not Akiva Late Learners Club.*

I also had to admit to my husband that he's a much more tolerant and less judgmental person than I am. One of the more interesting things that my husband said recently was that, if we were younger, it might be interesting to become Yeshivat Hadar scholars and do, for lack of a better description, egalitarian kiruv, seeking to encourage observance among egalitarian Jews. I daresay that he'd be much better at it.

*Sons and Daughters of Akiva. For background regarding Rabbi Akiva, see here.

Parshat Lech L'cha: To me, this makes no sense

2011-11-04T14:07:00.014-04:00

You can read the basics here.

Why did HaShem choose Avram? No reason is given in Genesis, chapter 12, verses 1-3, though the rabbis have certainly created some fine midrashim (rabbinical interpretive stories) to try to explain this choice.

Sunday, November 6, 2011 update: My husband has the rather interesting theory that gaps were left in the Torah deliberately, to encourage us to come up with our own explanations.

Why did HaShem insist on this weird sacrifice (Genesis, chapter 15)? What was the point of killing those animals, since Avram wasn't going to eat them?

Sunday, November 6, 2011 update: The darshan (?--person who gave the d'var Torah/word of Torah/Bible discussion) yesterday at my favorite egalitarian synagogue in Manhattan said that this was a typical way of establishing a treaty in the ancient Near East, but that the unusual part is that only G-d (or G-d's representative fire and smoke), walked between the parts.

Why did HaShem not bother telling Sarai/Sarah that she was going to have a child before she offered Hagar to Avram/Avraham as a surrogate mother? Did HaShem want to create strife?

Autumn leaves+winter snow=widespread power outages

2011-11-01T13:11:00.009-04:00

Here's my initial report--I suggest that you pay particular attention to the comments.

Here's a current report from CNN.

Long story short: With leaves still on the trees, the limbs and branches were far more likely to bend and/or break, taking down electric power lines along with them. I think I've heard that the situation is even worse than after Hurricane Irene. My husband and I are very fortunate, indeed, to live in one of the sections of New York City that has its electric power lines buried underground.

Parshat Noach: "Clean" and "unclean" animals?!

2011-10-31T17:24:00.018-04:00

Here's my latest thought regarding this question that I posed in Parshat Noach: Another fine mess:

"B'reishit/Genesis, chapter 7, verse 2: HaShem--yes, HaShem, not Elokim--tells Noach [Noah] to take seven of every clean beast (male and female), and two, male and female, of every unclean beast. Nu, exactly how is Noach supposed to know which animals are "clean" and which are "unclean" when that list isn't mentioned in the Torah for at least another book and a half?"

My theory: The concept of "clean" and "unclean" animals was widespread in ancient times, and preceded the laws of kashrut (Jewish dietary laws).

The concept of "clean" and "unclean" animals is widespread in contemporary times, as well. Not only do Muslims follow some of the laws of kashrut by not eating pig meat, but Hindus avoid cow meat and are vegetarian, and Seventh Day Adventists are also vegetarian.

My favorite "kashrut" story, though, involves my stay in France while I was studying for a B.A. in French. I always thought that the hamburgers in the university's cafeterias tasted odd, but I could never figure out why. It didn't occur to me until long after I'd returned to the U.S. that the hamburgers had probably been made of horse meat. Noch besser (better yet), the reason why that bothered me was not that Jews don't eat horse meat, which isn't kosher--I wasn't keeping even a remote semblance of kosher at the time--but because Americans don't eat horse meat! (We also don't eat dog meat, and generally don't eat snake or alligator meat, either.) Food traditions persist to this day, and they don't always have anything to do with religion.

Links to my Parshat B'reishit&ParshatNoach posts

2011-10-31T17:21:00.006-04:00

Sorry I forgot to link to my previous posts. It's not as if I've never written about these parshiot before. :)

Two for the price of one: For a connection between Parshat B'reishit and Parshat Noach, see Uppity Humans.

Parshat B'reishit

I think you can find a link to many of my previous B'reishit posts at the beginning of Bothered and bewildered by B'reishit. Follow the links and enjoy.
See also the last two paragraphs of My mixed reaction to the book "Yentl's Revenge."

Parshat Noach

Parshat Noach: Another fine mess
Best explanation of why building the Tower of Babel was a sin that I've ever heard Ever wonder why G-d thought it was such a terrible thing that the people were all speaking one language? Rabbi Jonathan Sacks gives a perfectly logical explanation.
Here's the one that I just posted, Parshat Noach: "Clean" and Unclean" animals?!

They had a blast

2011-10-31T17:17:00.005-04:00

Indeed, everyone had a smashing good time pulverizing my husband's latest kidney stone with shock waves. Let's hope it worked.

My husband himself seems not too much the worse for the pummeling, I'm happy to say. He's just upset that he can't go Israeli folk dancing for a week.

I'm next--I have an appointment with my urologist later this week.

Best explanation of BabelTower sin I've ever heard

2011-10-30T16:46:00.009-04:00

Have you ever wondered what was so sinful about all the people speaking the same language? Chief Rabbi Jonathan Sacks explains here:

"The reference seems to be to the imperial practice of the neo-Assyrians, of imposing their own language on the peoples they conquered. One inscription of the time records that Ashurbanipal II “made the totality of all peoples speak one speech.” A cylinder inscription of Sargon II says, “Populations of the four quarters of the world with strange tongues and incompatible speech . . . whom I had taken as booty at the command of Ashur my lord by the might of my sceptre, I caused to accept a single voice.” The neo-Assyrians asserted their supremacy by insisting that their language was the only one to be used by the nations and populations they had defeated. On this reading, Babel is a critique of imperialism.

There is even a hint of this in the parallelism of language between the builders of Babel and the Egyptian Pharaoh who enslaved the Israelites. In Babel they said, “Come, [hava] let us build ourselves a city and a tower . . . lest [pen] we be scattered over the face of the earth” (Gen. 11: 4). In Egypt Pharaoh said, “Come, [hava] let us deal wisely with them, lest [pen] they increase so much . . .” (Ex. 1: 10). The repeated “Come, let us ... lest” is too pronounced to be accidental. Babel, like Egypt, represents an empire that subjugates entire populations, riding roughshod over their identities and freedoms.

If this is so, we will have to re-read the entire Babel story in a way that makes it much more convincing. The sequence is this: Genesis 10 describes the division of humanity into seventy nations and seventy languages. Genesis 11 tells of how one imperial power conquered smaller nations and imposed their language and culture on them, thus directly contravening God’s wish that humans should respect the integrity of each nation and each individual. When at the end of the Babel story God “confuses the language” of the builders, He is not creating a new state of affairs but restoring the old.

Interpreted thus, the story of Babel is a critique of the power of the collective when it crushes individuality – the individuality of the seventy cultures described in Genesis 10."

For my lighthearted discussion of a connection I just noticed this year between Parshat B'reishit and Parshat Noach, see Uppity Humans.

For a more thorough look at Parshat Noach, complete with links, see my Parshat Noach: Another fine mess.

A mite chilly for Rosh Chodesh Marcheshvan

2011-10-28T10:19:00.004-04:00

It was 39 degrees Fahrenheit (3.89 Celsius)when I left for morning minyan, and it's going to snow tomorrow. This is New York City--we're not used to getting sub-40 days and/or snow before mid-November. I'm not looking forward to this coming winter. But I'd better used to this weather--if it looks like global warming, and it acts like global warming . . . Sigh. As I said, we just live here.

In case you missed it, here's my parsha post for Parshat B'reishit and Parshat Noach.

Singing for Women's Dignity (by A. Kaplan Sommers)

2011-10-27T15:25:00.017-04:00

"Good news--Israeli women are fighting back against those who would hide and silence them."

Fighting back without bullets. I like this.

For further background, see Damned if we do and damned if we don't: My conclusion.*

*If you'd like to read the whole series, the first four posts of which are not related to the article linked about, here's the link to the links. Re posts #1 and 2, I no longer watch television on Shabbat.

Uppity humans

2011-10-26T16:39:00.010-04:00

First, they decide that they want to know the difference between good and evil.* Then, they decide that they’re going to build a stairway to heaven.**

Sigh. Well, I made them that way, and I guess I can’t just keep wiping them out in floods. So I suppose I’ll simply have to put up with them. But really, how arrogant of them, to think that they can defy Me and encroach on My turf with impunity.

*See Parshat B’reishit here.
**See Parshat Noach here and an explanation of the ziggurat theory here.

See also my post Parshat B'reishit: Fun with the DH :) (and more)

"Personhood" for embryos:Unborn=person,woman=0

2011-10-26T12:38:00.018-04:00

See Push for 'Personhood' Amendment Represents New Tack in Abortion Fight. This is appalling. Declaring a fertilized egg a person would "limit contraceptives, make doctors afraid to save women with life-threatening pregnancies . . ." In other words, it would render worthless the life of a fertile female if her life interfered with the survival of a clump of cells.

A little good news

2011-10-26T12:13:00.005-04:00

My drilled tooth is not infected, and the surrounding gum is not infected, either. I forgot, though, that my dentist always puts a crown in with temporary cement and lets his patient chew on it for a week, literally, to make sure that it fits as well as possible before he cements it into the gum permanently. He's quite a sculptor with dentist's drills, drilling the tiniest bits off of a crown to try to get the best fit possible. He's also extremely skilled with an anethesia needle--his injections are as painless as a needle in the gum can be. Did I mention that I love my dentist? Much as I wish him all the best, I'm not looking forward to his retirement, may it not come soon.

Frightening

2011-10-25T12:59:00.009-04:00

A couple of weeks ago, I took an ambulance ride to the hospital in honor of my first kidney-stone attack.

The following week, I cracked a tooth, and started the process of having it repaired with a crown.

The bills for the "privilege" of taking an ambulance ride and having my tooth crowned total roughly $2,500. And those are my medical bills for just the past two weeks alone.

Much as I love my native United States of America, it's downright scary living in a country with no national health-care plan. You might say, in a manner of speaking, that only the dead can afford to live here. :(

Pre- and post-Yom Tov round-up

2011-10-24T10:04:00.006-04:00

Here are links to my Wednesday, October 19-Sunday, October 23, 2011 posts:

The latest trend in NYC-kosher-restaurant sukkot
Adventures rabbah on Hoshana Rabbah
Hoshana Rabbah, done right (forgiveness requested)
No, it's not your imagination--What to say when and "The latest trend" (see link above) really do look better than when I first published them.
Sore on Simchat Torah, but not from dancing
A view from the opposite perspective

Enjoy!

A view from the opposite perspective

2011-10-23T21:25:00.001-04:00

I have long lamented my inability to keep up with the pace of prayer in synagogue. (See, for example, Near tears at morning minyan.)

So it was an interesting experience to find myself on the other side of the equation.

A new person has recently begun joining us for Minchah (Afternoon Service) and Maariv/Arvit (Evening Service) on Shabbat (Sabbath) and Yom Tov (holidays). Much to my surprise, the newcomer actually takes several minutes longer than I do to complete the Amidah prayer. I'm happy to say that we slow-pokes among the long-time "regulars" have trained our congregation well--the baal tefillah (prayer leader) always waits until the newbie finishes the Amidah. This is actually not a problem for non-High Holiday Minchah/Maariv Services, since we rarely get a minyan and aren't delaying more than a few people, though it would be a problem on the High Holidays.

What's equally interesting is that I now find myself facing a both-ends-against-the-middle situation. At one end are the speed-davvening yeshiva graduates, who are very accustomed to praying not only at top speed, but also loudly enough to distract Ms. ADD. At the other end is the newcomer, who, while clearly trying to whisper, doesn't seem capable of praying quietly enough not to be audible from one end of the sanctuary to the other. (My best guess is that the newcomer has a partial hearing loss.) I've lost track of how many times I've lost my place in the siddur (prayer book) over the past few evenings. I suppose it's good practice in forcing me to focus.

Sore on Simchat Torah, but not from dancing

2011-10-23T20:27:00.008-04:00

It all started after I'd participated in the hakafot at my favorite egalitarian Conservation synagogue in Manhattan. As I was leaving, I began to feel not so well.

At first, I thought it was just gas. But by the time I'd been home for about an hour, it was clear that I was having another kidney-stone attack. Apparently, I hadn't "passed" that stone, after all. :( My husband said that, from what he understood, a kidney stone can't be seen on a sonogram after it leaves the kidney and starts making its way south because there's too much in the way. Now you tell me?! :(

On the plus side, this attack wasn't as bad as the first one. I didn't have to go to the hospital. In fact, I even managed to get by without taking a Percocet.

But the story gets better: I was awakened quite early in the morning by soreness in my gum from my dentist's recent attempt to drill for oil. So I broke Yom Tov by calling him before going to synagogue, just to make sure that I shouldn't be going to the Emergency Room instead--after all, I'm not usually still sore four days after having a tooth drilled. He determined, judging by my description of my discomfort, that I wasn't facing an immediate emergency, but told me in no uncertain terms to call him on Monday at 7:30 AM so that he could check out my tooth as early as possible. He also informed me that the simple replacement of a broken tooth with a crown might have to be upgraded to a root canal procedure.

Between one bit of excitement and the other, I thought better of returning to Manhattan for the morning's hakafot, and ended up spending Simchat Torah morning at our local traditional Conservative synagogue for the first time in several years. Not for nothin' I usually davven/pray in a synagogue that's both egalitarian and more balanced, age-wise, on Simchat Torah--despite having had a kidney-stone attack the night before, I was still the only woman dancing. Sigh.

Oh, well. I hope I'll have better luck next Simchat Torah.

P.S. Much to my surprise, I got a call from my dentist shortly after I'd published this post. After hearing me describe how my tooth and/or gum felt, he concluded that I wasn't really facing an emergency and didn't have to see him tomorrow. However, when I see him on Wednesday to have the crown "installed," he'll take the precaution of using temporary cement and waiting a week before deciding whether it's safe to install the crown permanently or whether I need root canal.

Okay, enough of that boring news. We now return you to your regularly-scheduled blog.

No, it's not your imagination--

2011-10-23T15:36:00.009-04:00

--like a chulent left to cook overnight, my posts very often look better the next day.

See here.

Hoshana Rabbah, done right (forgiveness requested)

2011-10-19T13:01:00.018-04:00

Normally, the Shamash/Gabbai of my "kaddish minyan" assigns different volunteers to lead different parts of the service, only leading the whole service himself if he can't find another volunteer. This morning, however, the service was led from start to finish by my kaddish-minyan synagogue's cantor. I was very glad, because, given the complexity of the Hoshana Rabbah morning services, with the constant changes of which prayers are said and which melodies used (see this post and comments), it's likely that he was the only person present (with the possible exception of the rabbi) who had sufficient knowledge to lead the services correctly.

Among other traditions regarding Hoshana Rabbah, one is that this is our absolutely final opportunity during this holiday season to be forgiven for our sins. And so, speaking of Hoshana Rabbah done right, I ask your mechilah/forgiveness for having posted an inside joke without explaining it to those of my readers who are not yet well acquainted with Jewish prayer. This past August, I introduced the cantor of my kaddish-minyan synagogue as Cantor Speedy KoloNaim. I should have put a note at the bottom of that post explaining that I'd swiped that name--"kolo naim" means "his voice is pleasant"--directly from the Hineni prayer chanted by a cantor before the repetition (Chazarat HaShaTz) of the Musaf Amidah prayer on Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. I hope you will forgive me for this sin.

G'mar Chatimah Tovah--may we all be sealed in the Book of Life.

Chag Sameiach!

P.S. While I was looking for a link to explain Hineni, I found this gem regarding Hoshana Rabbah on the same blog. (Thanks, Ellison!) Enjoy!

Adventures rabbah on Hoshana Rabbah

2011-10-19T11:23:00.015-04:00

Taking a lulav, cane, and umbrella into the subway without injuring anyone was certainly a great (rabba) adventure. I need more hands! :)

Then, when my "kaddish minyan" went outside to the sukkah to knock the leaves off our aravot (willow) bundles, someone commented, "This is getting really strange." So I threw in my two cents: "Of course it's strange--this is Hoshana Rabbah!" :) Hoshana Rabbah is certainly one of our more unusual Chol HaMoed days, as you can see from the details toward the end of this post.

For the record, I've officially given up trying to follow one of those "Hoshanot road-maps" that explain the order in which you're supposed to recite the Hoshanot ("If Thursday is the first day of Sukkot, the order is: Aleph, Bet, Chet, Hay, Vav, Daled"). I always lose my place (assuming that I'd ever found it), thereby confirming my reputation as someone with no sense of direction(s). :) I just make the seven circles while carrying my lulav and etrog, chiming in "Hoshana Na" at the appropriate times.

Eventually, I'll have to have a transliteration-correction party--Hoshana ends with the letter Aleph, while Rabbah ends with the letter Hay, so, according to the rules of transliteration (such as they are), Hoshana should not be written with an H at the end, but Rabbah should be written with an H at the end.

Chag Sameiach, everyone!

The latest trend in NYC-kosher-restaurant sukkot

2011-10-19T10:53:00.014-04:00

Rent a really long flatbed truck.
Park it directly in front of your kosher restaurant, or as close to it as you can get.
Have someone build at least one temporary flight of stairs leading from the sidewalk or street to the top of the flatbed.
Construct a sukkah on top of the flatbed. Installing an electric light or two in the sukkah would be considerate.
Place tables and chairs in the sukkah, and, if there's no other lighting, a candle in a wind-resistant holder on each table.
Enjoy the temporary increase in your profits, as seemingly every apartment-dweller in New York City squeezes into your sukkah for a meal. :) (Been there, done that. Yum!)

Baby-food blues

2011-10-18T15:51:00.005-04:00

I've got a sore gum (and jaw) where my dentist drilled to within an inch of striking oil :) to prepare a spot for a new crown--it'll replace a 30-year-old patch-up job that my dentist's late father, also a dentist, had put together. (I can't say that I didn't get my money's worth!) I really didn't think that there would be enough actual tooth left to put back together, and I was right. So Ms. Glamour Queen has been walking around with an aluminum temporary tooth since yesterday. That new crown is going to cost me royally, but I can think of worse things, health wise.

Moed Tov, and Chag Sameach!

What to say when: Accumulated information

2011-10-18T13:01:00.027-04:00

Here's some information concerning prayers and other rituals that I've picked up, and written down, over the years in an attempt to allay my own confusion. Perhaps it'll help some of my readers, as well, particularly the notes (toward the end) about Hoshannah Rabbah, which is tomorrow. Please pardon my usual formatting problems, probably caused by the fact that this entire post was copied from a Word file.

Service, Yamim Noraim, Shalosh Regalim, etc. information

Yaaleh V'Yavo is for all major holidays, including Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur in addition to the Shalosh R’galim (Yom Tov and Chol HaMoed) and Rosh Chodesh. October 2, 2008 update: Yaaleh v’Yavo is said during the Amidah of not only Shacharit, but also of Minchah and Arvit/Maariv.
October 2, 2008 update: The Malchuyot, Zichronot, and Shofarot sections of the Musaf Amidah are recited on Rosh HaShanah only (not on Yom Kippur). Mnemonic device for remembering the correct order: HaMelech Zocher et haShofar (The King Remembers the Shofar).
October 18, 2011 update: Yom Kippur’s “Long” Vidui/Confessional (“Ah Chet”) is recited for the last time during Minchah. Only the “Short” Vidui/Confessional (“Ashamnu”) is recited during Neilah.
October 18, 2011 update: The Neilah Service includes not only a full Amidah prayer, but also a Chazarat HaShaTz (repetition of the Amidah by the ShaTz/Shaliach Tzibbur/Representative of the Congregation/Prayer Leader). I can’t think of any logical halachic reason for even reciting the Amidah at Neilah, much less repeating it, since there was no sacrifice at that time of day, but I can think of a good logistical one—it’s a great time-killer, which is necessary in order to delay end of the service until well after sunset, when one is permitted to blow the shofar. [Larry Lennhoff has a better explanation--see his first comment.]
Amidah for Rosh Chodesh and Chol HaMoed:
Shacharit (and Mincha)—regular weekday or Shabbat version, to which one adds Yaaleh V’Yavo.
Musaf—Rosh Chodesh or Shalosh R’galim version (each of which includes Shabbat additions).
October 22, 2008 update: Hallel for Chanukah and Sukkot, including Chol HaMoed Sukkot, is always Full Hallel—there’s never a Half-Hallel during Sukkot or Chanukah. September 18, 2009 update: Hallel is not recited on the Yamim Noraim.
Aliyot
Shabbat:
If Rosh Chodesh, any of the Yamim Noraim, or any of the Shalosh R’galim, including Chol HaMoed, fall on Shabbat, they always have the 7 aliyot that are standard on Shabbat.
Weekdays:
Rosh Chodesh and Chol HaMoed—4;
Shalosh R’galim and Rosh HaShanah—5;
Yom Kippur—6.
October 2, 2008 update: Tashlich is recited on the first day of Rosh HaShanah (if possible), unless the first day falls on Shabbat (in which case it’s delayed until the second day).
October 18, 2011 update: I think I overhead Punster [my husband] confirming with Cantor X that the Hoshanot of Sukkot and Hoshana Rabbah can only be recited if one has a minyan.
The 1st reading for the 1st 2 days of the Shalosh R'galim is from Emor (leave the corners of the field for the poor; commandments re lulav and etrog, sukkah, etc.)
According to a co-worker, it’s assur/prohited for a Jew (in her community, this probably refers to men only) to eat anything other than “shehakol” outside of a sukkah during Sukkot. Punster tells me that one of his frummer colleagues from his job-of-30-years days would simply not eat at all if there were no sukkah available. Talk about 2 halachot canceling each other out, how on earth can you possible “rejoice in your festival” (see below) when you’re fasting, and isn’t it assur to fast on a Yom Tov? October 22, 2008 update: Rabbi X says that one is forbidden to eat only bread and mezonot (including rice, I’ve heard) outside of a sukkah during Sukkot. That sounds reasonable to me. (Note to self: Stock up on corn (fresh or frozen), corn thins, corn chips/and/or mezonot-free corn tortillas, and on potatoes and/or potato chips.) He also says that one is permitted to eat outside of a sukkah if one’s health would be harmed by eating therein. This is of particular relevance for seniors during cold weather. I think he said that one may eat indoors in rainy weather.
The 1st reading for Sh’mini Atzeret is from R’eh (“V’samachta b’chagecha…/rejoice in your festival . . .”).
October 22, 2008 update: The order of the end of the weekday Shacharit/Morning Service from Rosh Chodesh Elul through Hoshanah Rabbah is
Aleinu
Kaddish Yatom/Mourner’s Kaddish
Shir shel Yom/Psalm of the Day
Kaddish Yatom/Mourner’s Kaddish
L’David, HaShem Ori v’Yish’i
Kaddish Yatom/Mourner’s Kaddish

And now for something completely different: HOSHANA RABBAH

In addition to doing seven Hoshanot, as opposed to the usual one Hoshana, and beating the aravot/willows:

We use the the Shabbat and Yom Tov version of P’suké D’zimra, rather than the weekday (Chol) version.
We use the Shabbat and Yom Tov version of Seder Hotzaat HaTorah, rather than the weekday (Chol) version.
We recite “Adoshem, adoshem kél rachum v’chanun” as we do on Yom Tov, rather than omitting it as we would usually do during Chol HaMoed. October 2, 2008 update: I think this prayer is only recited if there’s a minyan.
During Seder Hotzaat haTorah, we recite “kadosh V’NORAH sh’mo.”
The baal tefillah wears a kittel during Musaf.
We recite the Musaf K’dushah for Yom Tov, not the one for Chol haMoed.
We sing Ein Kelokénu and Adon Olam. (Is this an optional minhag?)
Some have the minhag to recite HaShem Ori V’Yishi for the last time of that Yamim Noraim season at the Shacharit of Hoshana Rabbah. I don’t know what the alternate custom is. October 2, 2008 update: I think the alternative custom is to recite HaShem Ori V’Yishi for the last time of that Yamim Noraim season at the Shacharit of Shemini Atzeret.

I have heard people wish one another a “good kvittle.” Even Rabbi X doesn’t know what that means. I guess I’ll just have to swallow the old pride—time to admit to ignorance and ask. October 2, 2008 update: I’ve heard that a kvittle is what some people call those little notes that one leaves in the cracks of the Kotel, or, for those who believe in doing such a thing, at the grave of a tzaddik—personally, I’m not fund of the custom of asking the dead to intervene for me in heaven, since I think that praying through the dead, as it were, is a bit pagan.)

Gilad Shalit is alive, free, and home!

2011-10-18T09:13:00.002-04:00

Baruch shehecheyanu! See photos of his release here. This Sukkot has become a double Z'man Simchateinu/Season of Our Rejoicing.

An experience unique to Sukkot--

2011-10-18T09:06:00.005-04:00

--riding the subway with a lulav. It was an interesting challenge to davven/pray the basics (Baruch Sheh-Amar, Ashrei, and Yishtabach) of the P'sukei D'Zimrah section while carefully positioning the lulav so that it wouldn't poke either seat-mate in the eye. And I was relieved to see that there was enough room in the subway car on the way home from minyan, at the height of the morning rush hour and headed toward Manhattan, for both me and my three-foot-long leafy green companion.

But enough of this subway silliness--we have far more important things to celebrate.

Sukkah sittin'

2011-10-17T11:19:00.016-04:00

I once complained, in a post that I can't find but probably published more than a year ago, that our local synagogue made it logistically challenging for us to eat in their sukkah whenever they rented out the sanctuary and lobby during Sukkot because our sukkah space is located in the lobby under an openable skylight. The response surprised me considerably, though I suppose that it should not have done so--a commenter politely reminded me that the mitzvah (commandment) of eating in a sukkah during Sukkot is an individual, not a communal, one, and therefore, responsibility for finding a sukkah in which to eat devolves upon each individual Jew--a synagogue is not obligated to provide a sukkah for daily use.

Fortunately, we've had a delightful Sukkot, thus far. We had three lovely kiddush lunches in the synagogue sukkah, and enjoyed bring-your-own dinners there on the first three nights of Sukkot. (We were too stuffed from eating kiddush leftovers at Seudah Shlishit to bother eating dinner on Saturday night. :) ). And we spent yesterday with old friends, some of whom we haven't seen in years. As for the next few days, the need to find a sukkah in which to eat dinner gives us an excuse to spend more time in ye friendly not-so-local kosher restaurants than usual. :)

I hope you're enjoying Sukkot, also. Moed Tov!

Here's a blast from the past. Enjoy!

Pick a mitzvah

2011-10-17T06:45:00.004-04:00

We had a choice--either we could eat in a sukkah, or we could pay a bikur cholim visit to some sick friends who were in no condition to eat outdoors. So we cleaned out the glatt kosher stores and restaurants in their neighborhood and arrived at their apartment with half of dinner. And a Moed Tov was had by all.

Adventures in observance,Tishrei YomTov edition

2011-10-16T12:33:00.031-04:00

First, my husband set the Shabbos clock for Yom Kippur (Day of Atonement) and then forgot to turn it on. So we didn't dare take a nap during the break, lest we miss Minchah (Afternoon Service).

Then, he set the Shabbos lamp (see post linked above for photo and description) for Sukkot, but forgot to indicate what the time was when he set it. So, for three days straight, that darned lamp turned itself off before we got home from eating in the synagogue sukkah and turned itself on every morning at 4 AM.

Then it was my turn. First, I carefully remembered to turn off my computer speakers, but completely forgot to turn off my monitor, so I had to stare at that light for three days. Between that and having to leave the living room light on because of a broken timer, we're going to have an electricity bill the size of the national debt. Note to self: Buy new timer before Wednesday!

On top of that, I stupidly made tzimmes to eat in the synagogue sukkah. It spilled on the table, the floor, and my shoes. Next year, kugelach/kugels (savory "puddings")! I'll probably buy potato, lukshen/noodle, and butternut squash.

And, to boot, I noticed something rattling in my pocket. It turned out that I'd forgotten to remove the change from my trip to the office candy machine to buy peanuts earlier that afternoon. Oy. I left the change on the counter in the synagogue ladies' room.

Last, but not least, we couldn't find the Kohelet (Ecclesiastes) books yesterday (for the second year in a row, according to someone who's been a synagogue member for probably over 30 years and obviously has a better memory than I). What a surprise. Not.

Re-posting "Showering on Yom Tov" rules

2011-10-11T13:01:00.018-04:00

Here are a few links regarding the rules for taking a shower on a Yom Tov (major holiday) that doesn't occur on Shabbat (Sabbath). I'm sorry that I forget to re-post this before Rosh HaShanah.

Hmm, maybe I'll take Rabbi Hausman up on his interpretation--his opinion is that shampooing on a Yom Tov that doesn't coincide with Shabbat is permissible. Now, if only I could figure which opinion to follow regarding the comb-vs.-brush question--some rabbis say that using a soft brush is permissible but using a comb is not (see 34. Shearing), whereas others say that using a comb is permissible, but using a brush is not. Alternatively, I could just decide that, since my purpose in using either one is to look good, not to remove hairs, I'll just ignore the fact that hairs get removed by accident and use both.

Chag Sameach (Happy Holiday)! Here's hoping that we don't get soaked in our sukkot during Sukkot.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011, AM update:
I tried just combing my hair after shampooing this morning, without using my round brush at all. Much to my pleasant surprise, I was able to make my hair look almost as presentable without the brush as with it. So I'll stick to Rabbi Hausman's p'sak (ruling concerning halachah/Jewish religious law) and use only a comb for tomorrow and Friday. I still can't figure out whose p'sak to follow for Shabbat, though.

Stoned for my sins, so to speak :(

2011-10-09T11:24:00.017-04:00

Given my preference of ways to repent, having a kidney-stone attack would not have been my first choice. :( But there I was on Thursday night and well into Friday morning, having a not-so-romantic evening in the ER with my husband. Fortunately, I seem to have "passed" that stone (meaning that it came out during a trip to the ladies' room), but the doctor who poked me with a "sonar" (ultrasound?) wand told me that, having cleared a stone from the left kidney, I still have two in the right kidney. The irony is that I had planned to see my urologist after Simchat Torah to arrange for that surgery that they can sometimes do to break up kidney stones in the hope of preventing an attack. Oh, well, too late now. But I certainly hope that the surgery breaks up whatever stones are still left, so that I don't have to sing "Breaking up is hard to do." Alternatively, I hope that these two will pass. :)

Shutting up now, before the Pun Police come after me. :)

P.S. Just in case, I'm now carrying, in a prescription bottle in my purse, proof of membership in the Perky Set. :) [Shira runs from Pun Patrol.]

On being the cause of a tirchah d’tzibbur :(

2011-10-05T15:02:00.005-04:00

Normally, I would complain that, given the slow speed at which I read Hebrew, it’s either kavannah or kehillah—I have no focus (kavannah) when davvening/praying with a kehillah (congregation) because I’m always in such a rush to keep up. In recent weeks, however, as a result of conversations with friends, I’ve become more aware of the effect that my words and/or deeds have on others. This put me in a rather unusual position during Rosh HaShanah: I became acutely aware that I was creating a tirchah d’tzibbur, a burden on the congregation, because the folks up front were delaying the Reader’s Repetition/Chazarat HaShaTz of the Amidah prayer of the Musaf service until I and the few other “stragglers” finished the "silent" (recited by each individual in an undertone) Amidah. Sadly, this doesn’t seem to be a problem with a solution.

RH highlight: A conversation with our HH rabbi

2011-10-03T12:51:00.007-04:00

Fortunately for us, we had the pleasure of hosting our local synagogue's High Holiday rabbi for dinner on Erev Shabbat Shuvah. What a discussion we got into regarding Akeidat Yitzchak/the Binding of Isaac (which we read on the second day of Rosh HaShanah)! My husband tried to justify the actions of Avraham Avinu/Abraham our Father by saying that Molech worship, typical of that time and place, demanded child sacrifice, so Avraham simply assumed that HaShem expected him to prove his faith in the same fashion. But the rabbi disputed this assertion, insisting that, up until then, HaShem had expected Avraham to believe and behave differently from the surrounding pagans. So I piped in that not only was Avraham's behavior out of character, in that he'd previously argued with HaShem to spare Tz'dom and Amora (Sodom and Gemorrah), but HaShem's behaviour was out of character as well. Why on earth (or in heaven) would HaShem want to stoop to the level of a pagan god and demand child sacrifice?

It's really too bad that our congregation can't afford to hire a rabbi on a regular basis. I think that our High Holiday rabbi is really an excellent speaker and thinker, not only in front of a congregation, but around a Shabbos table, as well. I'm looking forward to hearing him speak on Yom Kippur.

For another interesting discussion regarding the Akeidah, I recommend this d'var Torah by Rabbi Shlomo Riskin.

“HH”: Remembering my shul-choir-member days

2011-09-28T10:48:00.014-04:00

I have fond memories of the years—over a decade—that I spent in the alto section of my former synagogue’s volunteer choir. I loved the music that I learned and sang. In fact, I chose my blogger name to honor Salamone Rossi, possibly the first, and certainly one of the finest, Jewish multi-part choral composers since the days of the Bet HaMikdash/Holy Temple.

Some of the HH—High Holidays/Yamim Noraim—choral selections had their good and not-so-good points. One of the last pieces I learned and sang was a four-part U-n’taneh Tokef with multiple solos. It was absolutely gorgeous—but it was also probably at least as long as Kol Nidré! What on earth was the conductor thinking, asking a mixed-age crowd to stand for so long right before the K’dushah? Of all the compositions that we sang, that one was almost certainly the most obviously composed as a concert piece. The more halachically-inclined might also object to all the word-repetition in that particular composition—our current synagogue’s last rabbi always said that one is not supposed to repeat words when davvening/praying.

That said, I have very fond memories of HH in the choir box (which, fortunately, was on the main floor and completely visible—I can’t stand those “angels-singing” hidden choirs). The music and camaraderie were a pleasure. And my HH choir days left me with a long-term benefit—I’m much better acquainted with the Machzor(im)/prayer book(s) of Rosh HaShanah/New Year and Yom Kippur/Day of Atonement than I would have been had I not spent years in the choir box. Thank you, Mr. Rossi, Louis Lewandowski, Salomon Sulzer, Ernest Bloch, Sholom Secunda, Cantor Charles Osborne, and company, and thanks to that old choir gang of mine.

For your pre-holiday enjoyment, and with thanks to MyJewishLearning and the Zamir Chorale of Boston, I present here snippets of two of the songs by Rossi that I used to sing in choir. (And yes, there are two separate groups from the same choir singing this Adon Olam--when my old choir sang this, I sang alto in the second group. For parts of this song, the two half-choirs combine and sing in eight-part harmony. It's gorgeous!)

Shanah Tovah u-m’tukah, Have a good and sweet year.

Parshat Nitzavim-Vayelech, belated

2011-09-27T17:02:00.011-04:00

You can read the basics of Nitzavim here, and the basics of Vayelech here.

Just two comments and a story:

First, I'm getting rather tired of Moshe's/Moses constant complaints about this alleged kingdom of priests and holy people being a nation of backsliding sinners, though I suppose that's appropriate for this time of year.

Second, what's all the song and dance about why Moshe died when he did? Why can't we just accept the notion that he died of old age? If Moshe himself can admit that he's too old to get around very well anymore (see Deuteronomy, chapter 31:2), why can't we?

(My husband's less in-your-face take on Moshe's death was that the Jewish People had to grow up and learn to assume responsibility for our own actions, rather than expecting "Daddy" to intercede with HaShem on our behalf. Not a bad drash for the Shabbos before Rosh HaShanah.)

And now, for the story: The rabbis really gave G-d a run for His money with Deuteronomy 30:12, as you can see in the Talmudic tale of the oven of Achnai.

Shanah Tovah u-M'tukah, a Good and Sweet Year to all. May you be blessed with health and happiness.

No, it's not your imagination--

2011-09-23T13:07:00.001-04:00

--like a chulent left to cook overnight, my posts very often look better the next day.

I have to reformat many of my posts on my home computer because, for reasons unknown, many of my formatting corrections simply don't "take" on my office computer.

And lately, just to make blogging more challenging, I've found that the "editor's pencil" no longer appears on my office screen. I have to edit by clicking on the Sign-In tab (even though I've obviously already signed in), then the Edit Posts tab, then the individual post. Deleting a comment requires clicking on the Sign-In tab, then the Comments tab, and I have to be particularly careful when deleting a comment because the display in the Comments window doesn't even separate the comments by post.

The biggest pain, though, is that I can longer edit old posts except at home. I can no longer simply find an error, click on the "editor's pencil," and make the correction and/or addition. Now, I would have to search through literally months or years worth of Edit Post pages to get to the post in question.

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

[Actual publication date Sunday, October 23, 2011.]

I wish this would work for Shalit

2011-09-22T15:22:00.000-04:00

“Fattal and Bauer were released earlier Wednesday on bail of $500,000 each and their sentences for spying convictions were commuted, Iran's judiciary said, according to government-run Press TV. The departure of the two from Iran effectively meant the bail money will be forfeited and kept by Iran.”

I was delighted and relieved to hear that these young men were finally freed. I only wish that $500,000 “bail” would be enough to secure the release of Gilad Shalit. Fat chance. Israel can’t even buy Shalit’s freedom--assuming that he's still alive--no matter how much the Palestinians cry poverty. And, given the fact that the last proof that Shalit was alive dates back almost two years, I’m sorry to say that I no longer assume that he's still alive. :( So much for Pidyon Shvuyim.

Fashion fiascos (in honor [?] of Fashion Week)

2011-09-21T13:05:00.012-04:00

Guys

I truly don’t understand a trend among some—thank goodness far from all—young men to buy pants so oversized that they fall below the hips and expose the underwear. With just one clothing choice, these guys manage to look sloppy, indecent, and immature, all at the same time. Sorry, guys, but running around in your underwear is for pre-schoolers.

Gals
Call me old-fashioned and I’ll plead guilty as charged, but I can’t for the life of me comprehend why any woman would want to wear a pair of pants with a brand name, or anything else, sewn or printed (or whatever) all the way across her butt. I prefer the path of moderation in clothing: I see no good reason for a woman to hide her figure under a burka, but neither do I see any good reason for advertising one’s assets, or, for that matter, letting any other individual or entity use those assets for his/her/its own advertising.

The apparel business
One of the “finer” (read: more expensive) stores in New York City sent me an e-mail inviting me to a sale on their suits. So I checked out the sale. Aside from the fact that, even with the substantial price reductions, the suits were too expensive for me, I was dismayed to discover an additional problem: When I clicked on Size 10-12, the names of most of the designers disappeared. What do they think I am, a walking faux pas?

Even when I was still in my twenties, weighed less than 120 pounds, was still 5’3” tall, and had no potbelly whatsoever, I can’t remember ever having been smaller than a size 8. How light in weight must a woman be, and how small on top and bottom, to be considered a “normal” size rather than a “fat-lady” size?

My pots are going to pot :(

2011-09-20T13:34:00.004-04:00

This is the second time in probably less than a decade that I've burned a pot so many times that the seam joining the aluminum-cored, stainless-steel-clad bottom to the rest of the pot has popped open, forcing me to put the pot into the recycling bin. My mother is probably having a conniption fit in heaven, wondering what on earth I'm doing to the pots that she gave us before making aliyah. I really must be more careful about using a timer. Being a "housewares hazard" is becoming hazardous to my financial health.

Parshat Ki Tavo, slightly belated

2011-09-19T13:07:00.002-04:00

You can read the basics here.

The good part is Deuteronomy, chapter 26, parts of which are quoted in the Haggadah.

It's mostly downhill from there, since the tochachot (curses) for defying HaShem's laws far outnumber the b'rachot (blessings) for obeying them.

As for the ending, Moshe's (Moses's) claim that our ancestors wore the same clothing and shoes for 40 years (see Deuteronomy 29:4), is, in my opinion, as preposterous an exaggeration as his claim that he stayed on Mount Sinai for 40 days without water.

The laws of mourning: Designed to depress?

2011-09-15T12:40:00.007-04:00

It’s not bad enough that I lost my father? It’s not enough that I’m showing respect to his memory by hopping on a subway headed in the opposite direction from my office in order to pray at a synagogue that has a minyan and say kaddish for him? I’m also supposed to refrain from listening to music and going to concerts, movies, the theater, simchas/s’machot (joyous events, such as weddings), and parties for an entire year? The laws of mourning seem to prohibit just about any activity that could help a mourner cheer up, as if to ensure that he/she remains in a prolonged state of depression.

A good friend recently asked me why, in recent years, I’ve insisted on observing details of halachah/Jewish religious law that really upset me. Good question. I may have reservations about Conservative Judaism, but Orthodoxy isn’t necessarily the answer for me. Yes, Orthodox Judaism provides a consistent structure to one’s life, but it’s also unkind to gays and agunot. Is this really the way I want to live?

Anatomy lessons

2011-09-14T10:09:00.016-04:00

People have shoulders
Some of the cars in the New York City subway system were designed with "bucket" seats. Unfortunately, the designers failed to take into account the fact that people are wide across the top, as well as across the bottom, and the "bucket" seats prevent us from sliding sideways to make the necessary accommodations. The upshot is that we end up literally rubbing shoulders with total strangers, whether we want to or not. This is a case of quite literally putting the squeeze on us riders.

Yes, men and women are different
Let's just say that it has been tactfully explained to me that men often find it uncomfortable to put their knees too close together. But some guys take "getting some air down there" to an extreme. I can't tell you how many times I've felt, when riding the subway, that if I put my knees any closer together, they'd get glued to one another. Sometimes women simply conclude that expecting to be left enough room to sit in some reasonable semblance of comfort is a lost cause, and choose to give up their seats and/or stand for the rest of the trip.

Ah, the joys of subway riding. On the plus side, at least we don't have to pay for gas.

A lesson from the War on Terror

2011-09-13T17:25:00.004-04:00

From the comments to Heshy's Lessons I learned from 9/11:

Telz Angel September 12, 2011 at 1:27 PM

The lesson I learned from the US lead war on Terror: There is a huge legal difference between the targeted killing of Osama Bin Laden (plus the irrelevant collateral victims in his house) and the targeted killing of any Palestinian terrorist in Gaza, the “West Bank” or elsewhere (plus the tragically innocent people who were murdered while reading poetry together with him).

The difference is that first is a victorious accomplishment worth celebrating, and the second is state-sponsored assassination and terror worthy of international condemnation. Why? The difference is obvious: Bin Laden promoted the killing of Americans.

This is about as clear as a lesson as any.

Americans just call it 9/11. We know what that means.

2011-09-11T00:01:00.003-04:00

Here's the way I remember the terrorist attacks of 9/11/2001, September 11, 2001.

Ten years. In the interim, has the world changed for the better, or for the worse?

Parshat Ki Tetze/Ki Teitzei, Ki Tétzé, Ki Tétsé. . .

2011-09-09T17:49:00.007-04:00

You can read the basics here.

The sons of favored wives get no special favors, according to Deuteronomy 21:15-17 (see here). Of course, this rule would have forbidden the behavior of Yaakov Avinu/Jacob Our Father, in Sefer B’reishit/the Book of Genesis, in favoring Yosef/Joseph, the older son of favored wife Rachel, over his older brothers, who were the sons of Leah and both concubines. It’s a good thing that we don’t have a tradition that chronology is irrelevant in the Torah (“There’s no ‘early’ or ‘late’ in the Torah/Ein mukdam u-m’uchar baTorah,” if I have the spelling , er, transliteration correct). :)

Ben Sorer u’Moreh/a stubborn and rebellious son (Deuteronomy 21:18-21—see previous link). Oy. In the long run, the rabbis made so many rules defining the Ben Sorer u’Moreh that it became, for all practical purposes, impossible to put a rebellious teenager to death, which is fortunate for us descendents, because some of us might not have survived our teenage years, otherwise. The rabbis claimed that no child ever suffered this punishment, I’ve heard. Whether or not that’s actually true, it’s good to know that, already in Talmudic times, this rule was considered so repugnant that it was legislated out of existence.

Sorry, was working on major projects at the office and got home late--no more time to write before Shabbat.

Al chet sheh-chatati/for the sin that I committed . . .

2011-09-08T20:27:00.003-04:00

. . . by being self-centered and insensitive.

Call me an idiot and you'd be right--I did not realize how upset some of my posts about my friends had made them. Effective immediately, my "personal" posts will be about me only. I expect to spend a few evenings on the phone apologizing.

Unwanted lessons in practical halachah :(

2011-09-06T11:44:00.029-04:00

We were walking under a tree on the way home from synagogue this past Shabbat/Sabbath when I felt something fall on my head, and asked my husband to investigate.

Oy. :(

"You'll have to wash your hair."

"But it's Shabbat!"

"You can't go back to shul with bird poop in your hair."

End of debate.

It got even better when we arrived home--after taking my jacket off, I saw that the little flyer had "let fly" on my jacket, as well. The only good news was that the dirty bird had missed my fancy pink and cream kippah with the braided edge--good luck cleaning bird poop out of a braid made of knitted yarn--by maybe half an inch.

Long-time readers of my blog know that I didn't get along particularly well with the last rabbi of our local Conservative synagogue, but I'll give him credit for what I learned from him. One of the things he taught us was that, if no pre-torn paper is available, one is permitted to use regular toilet paper on Shabbat "for the sake of dignity," but one has to tear it with a shinui, a change from one's usual method. (His preferred shinui was to tear it with his elbow. I find that too difficult, and prefer a karate chop with the wrist.) So I applied the principle of shinui--instead of getting into the tub, turning on both cold and hot water, and using shampoo, I washed the dirtied section of my hair at the sink using cold water and liquid hand soap. And I patted it dry instead of rubbing it vigorously with the towel, brushing it instead of combing it.

Sigh. Having already broken the prohibition against wringing liquid out of anything on Shabbat, I then had to break the prohibition against selecting, in order to wear a poop-free jacket back to Minchah-Maariv (Afternoon and Evening Services).

Not my favorite lessons in applied halachah/Jewish religious law. :(

See also The 39 melachot ("work" forbidden on Shabbat).

Happy 7th blogoversary to me, & thanks/gifts

2011-09-02T08:50:00.008-04:00

I'm delighted to have my blog back in one piece, after this week's mischief, in time to celebrate my seventh blogoversary today. Many thanks to my helpers:

Larry, who backed up my entire blog. (I'm afraid to open the file--I think my computer is acting funny enough already, lately. It's time to call in the geek squad, I fear.)
Rich, who offered to do "surgery" on my blog's template.
Sheyna and Eliyahu, who pointed out what the offending code might be.
Rich again, who, when I copied a pile of code from my template and sent it to my helpers, wrote back almost immediately to tell me exactly what to delete.

Thanks for the blogoversary presents!

"Cognitive Warfare"

2011-09-01T23:08:00.003-04:00

Some folks figure that they'll win more battles if they beat their swords into . . . public relations.

Parshat Shoftim

2011-09-01T12:48:00.011-04:00

You can read the basics here.

A few things caught my eye in reading Parshat Shoftim. One was the principle that one must have a minimum of two witnesses to inflict capital punishment (see Deuteronomy, chapter 17, verse 6).

Another phrase that caught my eye here, which I’ve read in other parshiot, is “HaCohanim HaLeviyim/the Priests the Levites.” This could have two distinct meanings—either we could accept what I assume is the current interpretation, which is that all Cohanim were members of the Tribe of Levi, or this phrase might indicate that all the adult males of the entire tribe of Levi were priests, at some point in ancient Jewish history.

I particularly appreciate the biblical ruling that a false witness should receive the punishment that he/she sought to inflict (Deuteronomy 19:15-19. :)

Chapter 20’s rules excuse a man from war for various reasons, right down to actual cowardice, are fascinating, but not really workable. That’s a heck of a lot of draft exemptions. But the viciousness with which our Torah says that our ancestors were to conquer the land is rather hard for me to stomach.

On the other hand, I’m glad there’s a prohibition against cutting down fruit and/or nut trees to use as siege weapons (see verses 19-20). We Jews have been tree-huggers for a few thousand years. :)

Publishing from my home computer. I hope this works. Then I'll follow up with the offers of assistance.

Verdict: Yes, I can still publish from my home computer--but the blog disappears within seconds after I click on "View Blog." Sigh.

The Mystery of My Half-Missing Blog :(

2011-08-31T23:38:00.011-04:00

The bad news: As many of the folks on my e-mail Contacts list already know, I haven't been able to access my blog from my office computer since sometime this afternoon.

The good news: I can still access it from my home computer.

The interesting timing: Friday, August 2 will be my seventh blogoversary. I certainly hope that I have something more pleasant to post about by then.

Thanks to those who offered to help. I'll try to get in touch with you tomorrow night. I had a long day at the office, and am too tired to do anything intelligent.

The Mystery of the AWOL Amen

2011-08-30T12:55:00.014-04:00

I didn't get it. Why did the chazzan/cantor of our local Conservative synagogue insist that one is not supposed to say "Amen" after the b'rachah/blessing that precedes the Sh'ma? Isn't a Jew always supposed to say "Amen" after hearing another Jew recite a b'rachah?

So I went on the trusty Internet and looked for an answer.

Much to my surprise, I saw that the ADDeRabbi addressed this very question all the way back in 2005, and even got a response from Jewish Worker.

Assuming that I understood correctly, the Hillel (standing on one foot) version, per the ADDeRabbi, seems to be that one should, indeed, always respond "Amen" to another Jew's b'rachah, but one shouldn't say "Amen" after reciting a b'rachah oneself (except after "boneh b'rachamav Yerushalayim/who rebuilds Jerusalem in His compassion)" in Birkat HaMazon/Grace After Meals). So if you don't finish the b'rachah before the baal(at) tefillah/prayer leader, a.k.a. shaliach(sh'lichah?) tzibbur/representative of the community, does, you're saying the b'rachah on your own and shouldn't respond "Amen," but if you do complete the b'rachah before the baal(at) tefillah does, then you should say "Amen." I hope I got that right.

Now, if only I could figure out why our chazzan doesn't leave time for us to say "Amen" after the b'rachah "oseh shalom u'vorei et ha-kol/Maker of peace and Creator of everything."

*AWOL, a U.S. Military acronym, stands for "Absent Without Official Leave."

BWolf:Whatever happened to polite disagreement?

2011-08-29T12:39:00.013-04:00

Good question, unfortunately. Why does disagreement seem to lead so frequently to insults, or even demonization, these days? Whatever happened to civil discourse? Aren't common courtesy/derech eretz and respect for another individual/kavod habriyot considered virtues anymore? To say that a person is incorrect is one thing, but to call him/her evil simply because she/he holds a different opinion is character assassination/motzi shem ra.

Battening down the hatches for Hurricane Irene

2011-08-26T10:56:00.021-04:00

I've been told, by someone who went there looking for them, that the hardware and houseware store nearest my office is already completely sold out of batteries. So I guess we'll just have to manage with what we have, plus candles. (I've also been advised not to use candles during the hurricane itself, because a strong gust of wind might break a window, knock over the candles, and start a fire.)

Fortunately, we had better luck at our local supermarket--my husband was able to stock up on water bottles and canned goods. I advised him not to buy anything that was unlikely to survive if the electricity went off and took the refrigerator and freezer with it.

Afternoon update:
Well, folks, it's official: Governor Cuomo has announced that all components of the New-York-City-area's Metropolitan Transportation Authority will be shut down beginning at noon tomorrow, and Mayor Bloomberg ordered mandatory evacuation of low-lying areas of the city by 5 PM tomorrow. I've already checked--we're fortunate enough not to live in Zone A, so we'll just stay home and ride out the storm. As for work, a decision will be made and disseminated Sunday night via phone blast, e-mail blast, and/or website informing us whether our organization will be open for business on Monday or not.

For all of us in the hurricane's path, and especially those expecting the worst of it, my prayers.

Saturday, August 27, 2011, 11:08 PM update
As mentioned in the comments, we took the advice of our Friday phone-caller and checked the Internet on Shabbat/Sabbath for the purpose of pikuach nefesh (life preservation). We were not evacuated, and will sit out the storm in our apartment. But we've heard that we are under a tornado watch, and have been warned about possible electricity outages. I've already recharged my cell phone, just in case, but whether we'll still have cell-phone service remains to be seen. We do have two things in our favor--we have a good old-fashioned land-line telephone (one that's plugged into a wall jack and doesn't depend on electricity), and our apartment is in a low-rise building of fewer than 10 floors, so we don't have to take shelter on a lower floor.

The worst of the storm is expected to strike the NYC area around 8 AM, along with high tide, unfortunately. Heavy flooding is expected in low-lying areas. My sister's old neighborhood, Battery Park City, which was built on landfill in the Hudson River, was under a mandatory evacuation order, and, being not far above the normal water level, is expected to be under about 6 1/2-7 feet of water by tomorrow morning. Likewise with other sections of NYC that are in low-lying areas (such as Brighton Beach and Coney Island, Brooklyn, which are directly on the Atlantic Ocean, Broad Channel and The Rockaways in Queens, Staten Island, City Island, Roosevelt Island, etc.), as well as the Long Island section of New York State (which is adjacent to the NYC boroughs of Brooklyn and Queens), and the coastal states of Connecticut and Rhode Island.

I was sad to hear that there have already been nine deaths caused by the onslaught of Irene. I pray for the safely of my blogger buddies, commenters and readers who are in the path of the storm. Be careful!

Sunday, August 28, 2011, 5:14 PM update
Now-Tropical-Storm Irene has passed through New York City (and State?), leaving in its wake lots of flooding, fallen trees, and electrical outages, but much less damage than expected, and, fortunately, no deaths in NYC (to the best of my knowledge at this time). The water did flood quite a number of buildings in the outer boroughs (which means any borough other than Manhattan), but Manhattan got much less flooding than anticipated, and so did even some of the low-lying areas elsewhere in NYC, though some Staten Island residents had to be evacuated at the last minute and quite unexpectedly when a lake overflowed. There was flooding farther upstate, and--their luck :(--an earthquake yesterday near Albany, but we in the NYC metropolitan area seem to have "dodged the bullet" (avoided [the worst of] a difficult situation), for the most part. My husband and I, and our neighborhood, seem to have escaped unscathed. I expect to be informed tonight whether or not I'll be going to work tomorrow.

I welcome reports from my readers in Irene's path. I hope all of you are safe.

Parshat Re'eh, R'eih, Reeh, er, whatever

2011-08-25T13:27:00.006-04:00

"Re'eh, Reeh, R'eih, or Ree (רְאֵה — Hebrew for "see", the first word in the parshah) . . ."

You can read the (rest of the) basics here.

The quote-hunter strikes again--This one appears in the Amidah prayer of Musaf (Additional Service) for the Shalosh R’galim/Three Pilgrimage Festivals:


טז שָׁלוֹשׁ פְּעָמִים בַּשָּׁנָה יֵרָאֶה כָל-זְכוּרְךָ אֶת-פְּנֵי יְהוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ, בַּמָּקוֹם אֲשֶׁר יִבְחָר--בְּחַג הַמַּצּוֹת וּבְחַג הַשָּׁבֻעוֹת, וּבְחַג הַסֻּכּוֹת; וְלֹא יֵרָאֶה אֶת-פְּנֵי יְהוָה, רֵיקָם.	16 Three times in a year shall all thy males appear before the LORD thy God in the place which He shall choose; on the feast of unleavened bread, and on the feast of weeks, and on the feast of tabernacles; and they shall not appear before the LORD empty;
יז אִישׁ, כְּמַתְּנַת יָדוֹ, כְּבִרְכַּת יְהוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ, אֲשֶׁר נָתַן-לָךְ. {ס}	17 every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the LORD thy God which He hath given thee. {S}

To be honest, getting up 45 minutes earlier than usual in order to commute to my "kaddish minyan" before commuting in the opposite direction to go to work is really wearing me out. I'm too tired to go back and re-read the parshah, which I read yesterday. One of the biggest drawbacks to moving out of our current neighborhood and into a Jewish one, second only to the increase in our housing expense, would be the increase in the length of my commute.

Blog as diary

2011-08-25T12:57:00.004-04:00

When I first started blogging, I thought I'd be posting mostly about the weekly Torah reading/parshat ha-shavuah. So it's come as something of a surprise to me that I often post on my blog things that I don't want to forget. Those who read my Vacation observations shortly after I published it this past Monday may wish to take another look--I've since added an entire paragraph about reciting Tehillim/Psalms on the trail.

Speed has its advantages and its disadvantages

2011-08-24T18:00:00.003-04:00

Cantor Speedy KoloNaim led the Matbeiah (from the Yishtabach prayer through the final Kaddish Yatom/Mourner's Kaddish) at minyan this morning. So help me, I think we got out at least five minutes earlier than usual, which helps us working stiffs get to the office on time. :) Of course, I hadn't even finished the second Ashrei when he got to the Kaddish Shalem/Full Kaddish "Titkabel." :(

" . . . time and chance happen to them all"*--health div.

2011-08-23T13:12:00.028-04:00

An old friend's husband has recently developed the rather unnerving (not to mention hazardous) habit of falling on his face, literally. When last we visited them, a couple of weeks ago, he'd fallen twice in the previous week, and, having been patched up by the doctor(s), had more stitches in him than Frankenstein's monster. :(

Upon our return from vacation, it occurred to us that, with his wife scheduled to return to teaching in a few weeks, it might be a good idea for them to obtain one of those "summon help in an emergency" buttons (example here) for him in case he fell in the apartment while she was in class. So I called to make the suggestion. Imagine my surprise and dismay when our "falling friend" informed me that it was his wife who was in the hospital this time, the victim of a medication mix-up by her physician(s) and/or pharmacist(s).

They've been married for less than five years, and each has undergone two rounds of major surgery since their wedding. Her husband is roughly the same age as mine, and she's only a year older than I. Not for nothin' my husband and I are taking turns worrying about eating a healthier diet. We've been relatively lucky, health-wise, and are trying to stay that way. But ". . . time and chance . . . " It's no wonder our old friend says that there's such a thing as planning too far in advance (though having money in the bank never hurts)--one never knows what life will throw one's way.

*Kohelet/Ecclesiates, chapter 9, verse 11

ON THE FRINGE—AL TZITZIT

Parshat Bo, 5772 (Jan. 2012)

Parshat Vaeira catch-up

My Limmud NY 2012 Conference link round-up

Missing at Limmud: Zimun and z'mirot

Limmud lesson: Tefillah b'tzibbur is a gamble :(

Limmud reminders for next year

Limmud NY 2012 Conference: Some highlights

Parsha catch-up: Vayechi, Sh'mot, etc., 5772

Less yacking, more packing: We're off to Limmud!

Parshat Sh'mot/Shemot (whatever)

How "modesty" turns women into sex objects (Forward)

With apologies to Robert Frost . . .

Parshat Vayechi

Yes, Virginia, there's such a thing as too discrete

'Twas the night after Chanukah (oops):1 more video

I'm getting sick from minyan

Parshat Vayigash: Torah's cliffhanger resolved

On a lighter note . . .

Fighting for the soul of Israel (the People & State)

Shlissel (Key) Challah: The Loaf of Idolatry? (Jameel)

Awkward moments

Parshat Miketz: Reuven said *what*?!

Rabbi Riskin's "Hanukkah letter to the hilltop youth"

Some Chanukah videos

For your Chanukah entertainment

The Tortoise and the Hare go to minyan

Parshat Vayshev, continued: More re Tamar

Don’t Tax the Rich. Tax Inequality Itself. (NY Times)

Another good reason why we should move

Electronic annoyances

Parshat Vayeshev

An Israeli "home-style" restaurant in New York City

Parshat Vayishlach--old and new thoughts

Fashion fiascos # 2

An interesting holiday weekend

Parshat Vayetz: A baby-making competition

Parshat Toldot: Disabled persons on our family tree?

Fun with the OU & the OK: Checking for bugs

Curses, fooled again*: A catalog-shopper's lament

Fairway-shoppers' kashrut alert: Parve becomes dairy

DovBear on resurrection: Originally a Jewish idea?

Parshat Chayei Sarah

Food news 2

Parshat Vayera: Tons to write about

My husband's the nicer one of us

Parshat Lech L'cha: To me, this makes no sense

Autumn leaves+winter snow=widespread power outages

Parshat Noach: "Clean" and "unclean" animals?!

Links to my Parshat B'reishit&ParshatNoach posts

They had a blast

Best explanation of BabelTower sin I've ever heard

A mite chilly for Rosh Chodesh Marcheshvan

Singing for Women's Dignity (by A. Kaplan Sommers)

Uppity humans

"Personhood" for embryos:Unborn=person,woman=0

A little good news

Frightening

Pre- and post-Yom Tov round-up

A view from the opposite perspective

Sore on Simchat Torah, but not from dancing

No, it's not your imagination--

Hoshana Rabbah, done right (forgiveness requested)

Adventures rabbah on Hoshana Rabbah

The latest trend in NYC-kosher-restaurant sukkot

Baby-food blues

What to say when: Accumulated information

Gilad Shalit is alive, free, and home!

An experience unique to Sukkot--

Sukkah sittin'

Pick a mitzvah

Adventures in observance,Tishrei YomTov edition

Re-posting "Showering on Yom Tov" rules

Stoned for my sins, so to speak :(

On being the cause of a tirchah d’tzibbur :(

RH highlight: A conversation with our HH rabbi

“HH”: Remembering my shul-choir-member days

Parshat Nitzavim-Vayelech, belated

No, it's not your imagination--

I wish this would work for Shalit

Parshat Miketz: Reuven said what?!